Translating Jodie Foster’s Golden Globes speech

a0be7e54e54a7777d76cb47b3282703e

Jodie Foster, who received the Cecil B. Demille Award for her 47-year-long career in Hollywood, offered an acceptance speech that has left audiences and critics baffled, outraged and inspired in equal measure. Foster addressed her sexuality more openly than she ever has — without actually saying she’s a lesbian — while also taking the press at large to task for continuing to bring up the issue.

“I already did my coming out about a thousand years ago in the stone age,” Foster said. “If you had been a public figure from the time that you were a toddler, you might value privacy.”

The overall message was unclear. Was she officially coming out? Did she announce her retirement from acting and directing? What does she have against Honey Boo Boo? It didn’t help matters that the audio cut out at a crucial moment as she discussed “a big coming out speech.” So what did the six-and-a-half-minute ramble actually mean?

We set out to decode it:

“I guess I have a sudden urge to say something that I’ve never really been able to air in public. So, a declaration that I’m a little nervous about but maybe not quite as nervous as my publicist right now, huh Jennifer? But I’m just going to put it out there, right? Loud and proud, right? So I’m going to need your support on this. I am single. Yes I am, I am single. No, I’m kidding, but I’m not really kidding.”

TRANSLATION: I recognize your hunger for a big confessional moment from me, and for that I am going to mess with you.

“Now I’m told, apparently that every celebrity is expected to honor the details of their private life with a press conference, a fragrance and a prime-time reality show. You know, you guys might be surprised, but I am not Honey Boo Boo Child. No, I’m sorry, that’s just not me. It never was and it never will be.”

TRANSLATION: I am going to equate being upfront about your sexuality with the more tasteless and tacky aspects of our reality TV culture, no matter how damaging it may be for young gays and lesbians to see a successful public figure refuse to say the word “lesbian.”

“There is no way I could ever stand here without acknowledging one of the deepest loves of my life, my heroic co-parent, my ex-partner in love but righteous soul sister in life, my confessor, ski buddy, consigliere, most beloved BFF of 20 years, Cydney Bernard. Thank you, Cyd. I am so proud of our modern family.”

TRANSLATION:
I was in a long-term relationship with a woman, and we have two children together. This is not necessarily news, but it’s the first time I’ve acknowledged her in front of television cameras.

“This feels like the end of one era and the beginning of something else. Scary and exciting and now what? Well, I may never be up on this stage again, on any stage for that matter.”

TRANSLATION: It’s difficult not feel you’re in some moment of transition when an organization gives you a lifetime achievement award, even if you’re only 50 years old.

So in summation:
Jodie Foster doesn’t need to come out of the closet because she already is out of the closet even if she never officially came out of the closet. And she’s not retiring from Hollywood, despite how the end of her speech was initially interpreted. “I could never stop acting,” Foster told reporters backstage. “You’d have to drag me behind a team of horses. I’d like to be directing tomorrow.”

But she is definitely single, we know that much.



News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
Local

Winning $7 million New York lottery ticket sold…

The only $7 million winning New York Lottery ticket for Monday's Cash4Life drawing was sold at a Queens 7-Eleven, officials said on Tuesday.

Local

Brooklyn man charged in roommate's stabbing death

A Brooklyn man accused of violently stabbing his roommate to death on Monday is in police custody and faces murder charges.

International

Dinosaurs could have survived asteroid strike

It turns out there is a good and a bad time for the planet to be hit by a meteor, and dinosaurs were just unlucky.…

National

OkCupid admits to Facebook-style experimenting on customers

By Sarah McBrideSAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - OkCupid, a top U.S. matchmaking website, intentionally mismatched users to test its technology, the IAC/InterActive Corp service said on…

Movies

Interview: Brendan Gleeson on the way 'Calvary' depicts…

Brendan Gleeson talks about how his new film "Calvary" began over drinks and how his character here is the opposite of the lead in "The Guard."

Movies

'Get on Up' producer Mick Jagger on the…

Mick Jagger, a producer on the James Brown biopic "Get on Up," talks about the time had to tell the singer some bad news and his favorite JB record.

Television

'Glee' star Lea Michele to appear on 'Sons…

"Glee" star Lea Michele has been confirmed as a guest star in the final season of "Sons of Anarchy."

Television

TV watch list, Monday, July 28: 'The Bachelorette'…

See Andi Dorfman make her big choice on tonight's 'Bachelorette' finale.

MLB

Angelo Cataldi: Ryan Howard deserves better from Phillies

Just last week, Ryan Howard endured the embarrassment of a benching that was inevitable, and yet still shocking.

NFL

Larry Donnell has inside track in Giants tight…

Little-known Larry Donnell of Grambling State currently has the inside track, as the second-year player has received the bulk of the first-team reps.

NFL

Computer to Jets: Start Michael Vick over Geno…

Jets general manager John Idzik says the choice of who starts between second-year quarterback Geno Smith and veteran Michael Vick will be a “Jets decision.”

MLB

Yankees looking to trade for Josh Willingham: Report

CBS Sports’ Jon Heyman reported Sunday the Yankees are interested in Twins outfielder Josh Willingham.

Career

What do you wear to a career fair?…

Getting that gig starts with presenting the most polished and memorable version of yourself, so refer to our expert fashion advice.

Style

Editors pick: Margiela's finger armor ring

These cool rings from Maison Martin Margiela are designed to overlap over the finger, covering each joint like armor.

Style

Givenchy champions diversity

Riccardo Tisci's uses a variety of ethnically diverse ladies for his spring campaign including Erykah Badu.

Wellbeing

Don't settle for the hotel fitness center with…

Travelers who want to skip the hotel fitness center in favor of local gyms that may offer better equipment, classes and amenities can turn to…