Competitive Erotic Fan Fiction: This ain’t your childhood story circle

ENTB_Erotic2_0613

“Hermione, sick of studying, rummaged through her bag. There it was. Did she dare? No one was in the Library, not even Madam Prince. Hermione threw caution to the wind for once in her life and pulled out her vibrator. Padma had given it to her as a prank joke on her birthday, but Hermione had put it to good use. She gasped just thinking about her last orgasm.”

If this doesn’t sound like the “Harry Potter” you remember reading (and the “Harry Potter” you let your kids read) that’s because it isn’t.

That’s a line from a piece of Potter-inspired erotic fan fiction we found on the Internet titled “Dirty, Erotic, Smutty Sex in the Library.” For the uninitiated, fan fiction is a term for a subset of fictional stories based upon about characters or settings of an existing work, written by fans of the original work, rather than by creator. And erotic fan fiction, well, you get the idea.

Not limited to children’s fantasy novels (though that makes the fan fiction all the creepier, which is often the point) fan fiction and erotic fan fiction can be written about a wide variety of genres including television, movies, comics, and more. If you can imagine it, and you can smut it up, then you can write it.

The thing is, though, that while we’re sure a fair amount of this particular type of literature is penned by pasty, 50-year-old virgins, typing sweatily and furiously in their parents basements at 3 a.m., fan fiction can also be mined for comedic gold. That’s the idea behind comedian Bryan Murphy’s Competitive Erotic Fan Fiction, a monthly comedy show (soon to be made into a podcast) he’s hosted for the past two-odd years at the Nerdist Theatre in San Francisco. The premise: eight comics write — and read aloud — short pieces of erotic fan fiction based either upon their own fancy or audience suggestions. The audience decides who has written the most titillating — or just plain absurd — story by a show of applause. We asked Murphy a few burning questions that sprang to mind when we found out that his show was stopping in town at the Davis Square Theatre next week.

How did you come up with the idea for this show?

I used to do a Valentine’s Day comedy show in Seattle, and a few weeks before I saw my friend Travis Vogt (a great comic/filmmaker) read a piece of ‘Cars’ erotic fan fiction at a show. It was hilarious — and it bombed. It occurred to me that Valentine’s Day would be a perfect time for a bunch of comics to write erotic fan fiction, so I made everyone performing on that show bring a piece and we had a competition. It was by far the most popular thing that night, and a month later I spun it off into its own show.

Tell me how it works.

Five comics bring pieces they have written in advance, based upon any subject they choose. Five other comics get audience suggestions for a topic, and have to write backstage while the first five read their pieces.

Do you write erotic fan fiction yourself?
For this show, yes, but it wasn’t something I was into before, because that would be pathetic.

Was the first show super awkward?
No, not at all. The (small) crowd who came out knew what they were in for, and it was great. There are times now when I get audience members who may not know what they’re in for, because I bring the show to comedy clubs. Comedy club crowds sometimes just show up for “comedy”, and don’t know that what they are going to get is the cast of Green Acres getting sodomized by Petticoat Junction.

What’s the best story you’ve heard or read so far?
It’s a three-way tie: Kyle Kinane doing “Rent: The Musical,” Ian Karmel doing “Criss Angel: Mindfreak,” and Ben Roy doing “Life Goes On.”

What about the worst, weirdest, or most uncomfortable?
Same three answers. The worst/most uncomfortable fan fiction IS the best fan fiction!

What makes a really great piece of fan fiction?
1. Know your subject really well or not at all (either extreme is hilarious).
2. Get to the f—cking
3. Make it tight. Very few people can keep it up for more than a few minutes.

If you could read a piece of erotic fan fiction about anything in the world, what would it be?
What do you mean could? I can! I may be the only person with such an option (and a regular audience who will listen). But it changes constantly. Lately, it’s “Girls.”

If you go

June 17, 8 p.m.
Davis Square Theatre
255 Elm St., Somerville
$10, 617-684-5335


News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
International

Powerful 7.2 magnitude earthquake rattles Mexico

A powerful earthquake struck Mexico Friday, shaking buildings and sending people running into the street, although there were no reports of major damage.

News

OMG! Exercise can make skin (and butt) look…

A moderate exercise regime can turn back time and actually reverse the skin's aging process, according to new research. The study showed that a minimum…

International

Jews in eastern Ukraine ordered to register, Kerry…

Secretary of State John Kerry condemned reports that Jews in eastern Ukraine had been ordered to register with the authorities "or suffer the consequences."

National

Chelsea Clinton pregnant with first child

Chelsea Clinton is pregnant with her first child.

The Word

Kate Middleton made fun of Prince William's bald…

Kate Middleton and Prince William are in Sydney, Australia, right now, and it sounds like that brash Aussie sense of humor might be rubbing off.

The Word

Is Tom Cruise dating Laura Prepon?

"Mission: Impossible" star Cruise is said to be dating Laura Prepon, star of "Orange is the New Black."

Television

'Scandal' recap: Season 3, Episode 18, 'The Price…

Sally is Jesus, Olivia caused global warming, and Mellie's still drunk. Let's recap the Scandal finale. A church full of Washington insiders is about to…

Movies

Review: 'Transcendence' is not stupid but sometimes lacks…

The cyberthriller "Transcendence" explores artificial intelligence, nanotechnology and other ethical quandaries, but has too much ambition, if anything.

MLB

MLB video highlights: Red Sox score two in…

Lester shines in Red Sox win over White Sox

Sports

2014 Boston Marathon preview: Elite American, International runners…

2014 Boston Marathon: Elite American, International runners to watch

NBA

2014 NBA Finals odds: Ranking which playoff teams…

2014 NBA Finals odds: Ranking which playoff teams have the best shot at a championship. The Thunder, Clippers, Heat and Rockets lead the way.

NFL

2014 Patriots, full NFL schedule release date announced

2014 Patriots, full NFL schedule release date announced

Style

Light-up nail art syncs with phone

This Japanese technology syncs light-up nail art with your phone.

Wellbeing

Why is dance cardio taking off in NYC?

Instructors at some of the city's hottest classes explain why.

Travel

Earth Day travel in the Florida Keys

See why this eco-friendly destination deserves your attention.

Tech

Sorry, Facebook — FarmVille goes mobile with 'Country…

Zynga has released a version of the hit "FarmVille" tailored for smartphones and tablets in the hope of reaping a bumper crop of players.