George Zimmerman wants to fight Kanye West

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File this item under “Uh, what?”

George Zimmerman (remember that guy? Yeah, the one giving OJ a run for his blood money for title of “Why Didn’t This Dude Go to Jail for Murder? No, For Real, What’s Wrong With the Justice System in America?”) is set to participate in a “celebrity boxing tournament.”

 

I’ll just let that sit there and simmer (zimmer?) for a moment.

Good? OK, I’ll go on. Well, he’s expressed an interest in fighting Kanye West in said tournament.

Need a breather? Sure.

Ready? Here is the reason the professional d-bag would like to get the professional rapper in the ring: Because of Kanye’s habit of, according to TMZ, “ attacking defenseless people.”

I just… You guys. I mean…I feel…

I can’t.

There are so many levels of irony/tragedy/crazy/[insert a word that means everything terrible ever that ends with a “y”] in that statement, that I can’t even begin to address it, much less come up with a witty one-liner about it.

I think I’ll just wrap this all up by saying that this one of the first times I’ve ever been in Kanye’s proverbial corner when it came to someone wanting to fight him. And I think it goes without saying that, if Ye declines this bizarre invitation to spar with Zimmerman, there are about 300 million people ready to step in and take his place in that ring.


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