Events we hate in sports

Brian Hoyer will look to lock-up the backup QB role with Ryan Mallett hot on his heels.

While I sat Monday night and half-watched the miserable 2012 MLB Home Run Derby in Kansas City, all it took was a few minutes of Chris Berman’s buffoonery and Orioles outfielder Adam Jones eating a plate of ribs (no joke, this really happened) to wonder, why does this event exist in the first place? With that in mind, here are some other things off the top of my head that pro sports could live without.

1. NFL Preseason games
You simply can’t go straight from training camp to the NFL regular season, so sadly preseason will always take place. Still, do we need to see Brian Hoyer throwing passes to Matthew Slater on four separate occasions and not two or three times? These glorified scrimmages are basically worthless and the only news that comes out of them is when a good player gets hurt.

2. marathon regular seasons
Along those same lines, you can’t help but look at three of the four major sports leagues in the U.S. (NBA, MLB, NHL) and realize that it would be a better product with a less lengthy regular season. No surprise, the NFL is the one professional league that has it figured out. Seventeen weeks of football is pretty much flawless despite the fact that it reduces us to drug addicts, with Roger Goodell being our main connect.

3. Shootouts
A relatively new addition to the NHL, the shootout basically caters to fair-weather hockey fans. Oh look, a breakaway! It’s not that ties are more exciting, because they most certainly are not, but what is the real point of shootouts? Especially when they are abandoned in the postseason when everyone is tuned in. Maybe I’m just bitter since the Bruins usually lack the skilled guys that excel in this cheesy format.

4. Penalty kicks.
To clarify, there should obviously be penalty kicks in the run of play during soccer games. For a sport that can be very boring, those are often the most exciting plays. However, by no means should that be the way to decide club championships (like the 2012 Champions League) or world titles (2011 Women’s World Cup). At that level, stopping a penalty kick is the result of not much more than pure luck. Therefore, it’s insane to have games end in that manner. Like hockey, they should have extra time until someone scores. If that takes too long, start taking players off one by one.


'Barack Obama cheats on Michelle' claims Japanese politician…

A senior Japanese politician has marred Barack Obama's official visit to Tokyo with bizarre claims that the President cheats on his wife Michelle. Kazuyuki Hamada,…


British Royal family devastated by freak NY death…

The British royals have been left devastated by the death of Mark Shand, younger brother of Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, after a freak fall in…


DA: Homeless man severely beat by men in…

Two former college football players pleaded not guilty to the alleged severe beating of a homeless man in Allston earlier this year.


Hamas, Abbas's PLO announce reconciliation agreement

The Gaza-based Islamist group Hamas and President Mahmoud Abbas's Palestine Liberation Organization (PLO) agreed on Wednesday to a unity pact.


‘Survivor: Cagayan’ recap: Episode 9

It was only an hour-long episode, but there's a lot to cover this week. The drama of Survivor strikes again as the identity of the…

Going Out

Thursty: Revamped Audubon is back in action

Having been a long time fan of Trina's Starlite Lounge in Inman Square, one of my only complaints about the place is that there's only…


Here's what to do in Boston this weekend

MUSIC Huun Huur Tu Friday, 8 p.m. First Church in Cambridge 11 Garden St., Cambridge $28, 617-876-4275 This group comes from the tiny nation…


TV watch list, Wednesday, April 23: 'Suburgatory,' 'Modern…

'Suburgatory' The men of "Suburgatory" go camping and Tessa mentors a social outcast in a Miss Chatswin contest, which brings her, once again, into conflict…


2014 NFL Mock Draft: Updated, new April 24…

2014 NFL Mock Draft: Updated, new April 24 version


MLB video highlights: Red Sox top Yankees, 5-1

John Lackey shines, Pineda ejected in Red Sox win


Bruins - Red Wings Game 4 preview: Boston…

Bruins - Red Wings Game 4 preview: Boston greedy for more dominance


Fantasy baseball: Searching for early season prospects

It’s relatively rare for a mediocre 30-year-old hitter to suddenly go nuts offensively for 162 games. That’s why minor league prospects are so exciting.


Pippa Middleton's Etsy pick: Golden Thread Jewelry

Get a look at the jewelry Pippa Middleton loves and find out how you can buy it too.


What every parent needs to know to get…

Mom and author of "Small Talk," Tracey Blake, shares her five practical tips to help you develop your children's language skills.


Subway crush: Meet your soulmate on your commute

Read about a couple who has been 40 years after meeting on the train.


Happy birthday, Game Boy! The handheld console turns…

Nintendo's Game Boy turns 25 this week. To commemorate, we look at some of its better games, like "Tetris" and "The Legend of Zelda: Link’s Awakening."