Okcupid tips: How to create the perfect profile

We ask an expert about creating a unique dating profile. Credit: Wikimedia Commons
We ask an expert about creating a unique dating profile.
Credit: Wikimedia Commons

The sometimes-crazy world of online dating can be daunting to navigate for those who have just decided to try it out. In his new e-book “Poke Me: A No-Nonsense Guide to Online Dating and Offline Loving,” author Kabir Chopra shows readers how to create a profile that suites their unique personalities. The author shared his advice on what to say in that all-important first message, how to pick the perfect profile photo and the mistake he thinks all online daters should avoid.

You write in the intro to “Poke Me” that you’ve seen the good, the bad and the ugly when it comes to dating profiles. What’s the one mistake that online daters seem to make the most?

The number one mistake is that people are not highlighting their personalities in their profiles. Some people are still shy about online dating, so they are very skimpy with their answers. The profile questions give you the opportunity to show your passions. I think the one mistake people make is that they aren’t telling people enough about themselves.

Poke Me Kabir Chopra Online Dating
Credit: Provided

 Can you give our readers some advice about what to write in that all-important first message?

Focus on whatever pops out at you about their profile. Basically, you want the person you are messaging to know that 1) you are a normal person that has actually read their profile and 2) that you have engaged their comments and mentioned whatever appealed to you about their profile.

In addition to being a writer, you also work in film and are a photographer. What makes a good profile pic?

The first thing is that it should be a good quality image and well-lit with a nice background. You should be the center of attention in the photo — I can’t say how many profile photos I’ve seen where there’s a huge group of people and you’re like “who does this profile belong to?’ Don’t do that.

How many photos should you include in a profile?

I would say five is a good number. You don’t want to have too many because you might come off as vain. I’d say that you should use photos of yourself in different environments, and that one or two selfies are okay. Your photos should also show a bit of your interests. If you are outdoorsy, take a photo outdoors. If you like biking, use a photo of you on your bike. And this should be self-explanatory, but you should look good in all of the photos and have a nice smile.

And what’s the one photo you absolutely shouldn’t use?

If you are a guy, don’t use pictures of you with lots of other girls. It makes you look like a player and turns women off. With girls, it’s basically the same thing. You don’t want to give off the impression that you already have a boyfriend or girlfriend.

Follow Lakshmi Gandhi on Twitter @LakshmiGandhi.


Turkey: Voting begins in country's first direct presidential…

Some 53 million people are able to vote in the election, including 2.8 million citizens abroad. Until now, Turkish presidents were elected by parliament.


Libya seeks ceasefire as south Tripoli a militia…

By Patrick Markey and Aziz El YaakoubiTRIPOLI (Reuters) - Black plumes of smoke marked shell blasts and bulldozed earthen barricades mapped out the frontlines around…

Breaking: News

Russia mad about sanctions, says U.S. contributing to…

Russia reacted angrily on Saturday to additional sanctions imposed by the European Union over Moscow's role in the Ukraine crisis, saying they would hamper cooperation…


Mutant worms stay sober, even on alcohol

U.S. researchers have developed "mutant worms" that do not get drunk by alcohol, a breakthrough that could lead to new treatment for people trying to quit drinking


Chris Martin dishes on 'conscious uncoupling' with Gwyneth…

"The thing we told everyone at the beginning of the year is true," says Chris Martin about Gwyneth Paltrow. "We are very close. We are not together."


'Game of Thrones' livens up Comic Con with…

By Piya Sinha-RoySAN DIEGO (Reuters) - Laughter and death did battle on Friday at HBO's "Game of Thrones" panel at Comic Con, one of the…


Review: Brett Ratner's big 'Hercules' movie is small…

The latest "Hercules," starring Dwayne Johnson as the half-god beefcake of Greek myth, strips its hero and tale of most of its fantastical elements.


Scientists recreate world's smallest Monet copy

Scientists have reproduced a famous Impressionist painting using nano-printing, to create what has been described as the world's smallest work of art. Reworked at the…


Kevin Love becomes third NBA player to pull…

Kevin Love of the Minnesota Timberwolves became the third NBA player to withdraw from consideration for Team USA in next month's World Cup, USA Basketball.

U.S. Soccer

Orlando City takes shot at NYCFC over Frank…

Orlando City reminded the world how big a signing Brazilian star Kaka earlier this month with a photo of Kaka mobbed by fans juxtaposed against Lampard.


Jeremy Lin says 'Linsanity' is over as he…

Jeremy Lin lit up the NBA two years ago with his play for the Knicks but he has no desire to recreate "Linsanity" in his new career with the Lakers.


2014 NFL Fantasy Football Top 100 overall player…

2014 NFL Fantasy Football Top 100 overall player rankings


Forget Wi-Fi: Li-Fi could be the future

Li-Fi technology – developed by Mexican company Sisoft – is wireless internet connectivity using specialized LED light.


Weather app Climendo might be the most accurate…

The wait for a truly accurate weather forecast could finally be over thanks to a nifty new app called Climendo.


Napkin Table puts focus off the phone and…

Michael Jan, a design student at Tunghai University in Taiwan, has invented a serviette-picnic blanket hybrid called the Napkin Table.


Essie's new Color Boutique

Essie launches high-tech kiosks at major airports and malls across the country.