Getting divorced? Here’s your new MO

It’s not always happily ever after.

Divorce is one of the most stressful and debilitating processes in life, but Lee Block — a two-time divorcee and the author of “Re-Singled: 12 Truths, Half-Truths, and Untruths of Divorce” — says it doesn’t have to be. For anyone caught in the process, here is her guide to retaining mental and physical health while moving on.

Do

 Forgive yourself
“This is the first thing I tell everyone. You have guilt, but life is a learning lesson and nothing is a mistake. Go forward armed with the knowledge you take from the divorce and what you’ve learned about who you are.”

Be grateful
“You’ve got to count your blessings: You have a roof over your head [and] food on the table. You and your family are healthy. Even if you have depression, start being thankful for those small things, and you will begin to feel better.”

Take some ‘me’ time

“Whether that’s walking, taking a long bath, starting a hobby or doing yoga, it allows you to focus away from what’s going on. Yoga or some type of mediation is centering. Do something that will help you start each day fresh.”

Don’t

Be angry
“This is very difficult, but it gets easier with practice. When you see your ex, just say, ‘Hello, how are you?’ and move on quickly. You don’t have to have a conversation.”

Speak any ill
“If your ex is badmouthing you all over town, don’t do the same thing. They’re probably picking at you to get a reaction. It’s like a child: If you give them attention, then they do it more. Take the high road.”

Be bitter
“There’s no such thing as fair. Take a step back and look at everything. Take a long look at the good things.”


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