No more drama: What’s keeping you stuck?

Stop blaming others for your problems. Focus on what you can do to make things better.

Tomorrow is a really big day for me: My book, “BE FEARLESS: Change Your
Life in 28 Days,” hits bookstores. Years ago, I never thought this would
have been possible, especially as I was once so bad at writing that my
seventh grade teacher called my parents out of concern. I share this
with you because it brings me to the heart of my book: change.

Change is possible. Yet, to many, change is elusive. People stay
stuck and they allow fear to get between them and what they truly want.
They’ve been looking for a shortcut — a way to get what they want
without having to face their fears. Here are the most common ways people
keep themselves stuck, either knowingly or unknowingly:

Waiting
Rather
than being proactive and taking the initiative, people spend time
hoping that the right person will magically walk into their life, that
the job promotion will just materialize or that their spouse will
suddenly start behaving in a less irritating way. If you wait for your
dreams to unfold, they will remain dreams. If you take action, you’ll
turn your dreams into a reality. “BE FEARLESS” will give you the courage
to take that initiative.

Wishing
Wishing for things
doesn’t create change. For that reason, I am not a fan of “The Secret”
and the so-called Law of Attraction on which it is based. I can’t tell
you how many clients came to me after they wished and wished for better
lives — only for their lives to continually get worse. “BE FEARLESS”
teaches you how to stop wishing and how to start living.

Blaming
Have
you blamed others for your problems? Perhaps you’ve gotten angry at
your boss, your significant other or someone else for making your life
miserable. “BE FEARLESS” will teach you how to stop focusing on what you
can’t control and, instead, to put your energy into all of the things
you can control. You can control what you say and do. It’s not as easy
to control what others say and do.

Waiting, wishing and blaming
will not lead you to the life you really want. What will? Taking action.
The “BE FEARLESS” program will show you just how to do that.

- Jonathan Alpert is a licensed psychotherapist. His new book, “BE FEARLESS: Change Your Life in 28 Days,” is out April 24. It will be sold at all major booksellers and Amazon. Check in with him online at www.jonathanalpert.com, on Facebook (www.facebook.com/jonathanalpert) and on Twitter @jonathanalpert.

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