Playing the Field: Maria Sharapova launches Sugarpova candy

No kid! Put down the candy! It's all a lie, it will ruin your tennis career! Credit: Getty Images
No kid! Put down the candy! It’s all a lie, it will ruin your tennis career!
Credit: Getty Images

On the list of dumb athlete endorsements, Maria Sharapova might have just taken the cake. Or is that candy?

The four-time major-winning tennis star launched a new line of high-end gummy candy Saturday. I kid you not. And what’s worse, it was all her idea.

“When the name Sugarpova came about, I loved the energy of it,” Sharapova told reporters at the launch Saturday at Tabula Rasa. “When we put it together with candy, I just felt like it was a great opportunity.”

My mind is beyond boggled by that one statement. Let’s break it down:

» Wait, people call you “Sugarpova” as a nickname? Who are these idiots? I want names.

» You “loved the energy” of a nickname? Who talks like that? When did Sharapova become Deepak Chopra?

» If you are unfamiliar with Tabula Rasa Essentials, a shop in Manhattan Beach, Calif., let me break it down for you in two ways. They sell pillows that say “Beach House” for $100. They sell votive candles for over $50 each.

These gummies, by the way, are shaped like Sharapova’s lips. I’ve always found something very disturbing about eating something shaped like lips. I see chocolate shaped like lips at Valentine’s Day and I imagine the people that eat them are the same ones who would spend 50 bucks on a candle. Who says, “Pass me some gummy lips”? There is something wrong with these people.

Anyway, I’m apparently in the minority, because people were lined up around the block at the launch. I know because Ms. Sharapova kindly tweeted the photo.

Human beings, you are really disappointing me.

Follow Metro New York Sports Editor on Twitter @MetroNYSports. On a semi-related note, is anyone else disappointed that the holiday candy season, post-Easter, is now over until Halloween?


News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
National

Man under evaluation for alleged gun threat at…

A man who allegedly threatened to open fire in the building that houses the Los Angeles Times' headquarters was being held in custody for a mental evaluation.

Local

Memorial held for Sean Collier, MIT police officer…

More than 1,600 people gathered at MIT on Friday for a memorial service for Sean Collier, the police officer shot to death a year ago in the aftermath of the…

National

Florida man charged with murdering son to play…

A Florida man annoyed that his 16-month-old crying son was preventing him from playing video games suffocated the toddler, police said on Friday.

International

Powerful 7.2 magnitude earthquake rattles Mexico

A powerful earthquake struck Mexico Friday, shaking buildings and sending people running into the street, although there were no reports of major damage.

Entertainment

Whoopi Goldberg makes her debut as marijuana columnist

"It helps my head stop hurting, and with glaucoma your eyes ache, and she takes the ache out. It's wonderful," she said.

The Word

Kate Middleton made fun of Prince William's bald…

Kate Middleton and Prince William are in Sydney, Australia, right now, and it sounds like that brash Aussie sense of humor might be rubbing off.

The Word

Is Tom Cruise dating Laura Prepon?

"Mission: Impossible" star Cruise is said to be dating Laura Prepon, star of "Orange is the New Black."

Television

'Scandal' recap: Season 3, Episode 18, 'The Price…

Sally is Jesus, Olivia caused global warming, and Mellie's still drunk. Let's recap the Scandal finale. A church full of Washington insiders is about to…

MLB

MLB video highlights: Red Sox defeat Orioles, 4-2

Brock Holt the difference in the Red Sox' win

NHL

NHL video highlights & analysis: Red Wings dump…

NHL video highlights & analysis: Red Wings dump Bruins in Game 1

MLB

MLB video highlights: Orioles top Red Sox, 8-4…

John Lackey roughed up for second straight outing

MLB

MLB video highlights: Red Sox score two in…

Lester shines in Red Sox win over White Sox

Tech

VIDEO: 'Vein-scanning' may become the future of paying

Designed to make transactions quicker and easier, the technology works by scanning the unique vein patterns in each person's palm.

Tech

#FollowFriday: 10 of the smartest Twitter accounts

Spending lots of time on Twitter? You might as well learn something. Here are some of the smartest accounts to follow.

Style

Light-up nail art syncs with phone

This Japanese technology syncs light-up nail art with your phone.

Wellbeing

Why is dance cardio taking off in NYC?

Instructors at some of the city's hottest classes explain why.