Charlotte and Jack break into a cabin like normal people. Credit: ABC/Richard Cartwright
Hello “Revenge” fans! Did you have a nice Easter/Passover? Welcome back to another week of everyone's favorite shenanigans in the Hamptons.
"Revolution" opens with Aidan and Conrad meeting in a shady garage. Conrad (who I just realized is decidedly shorter than Aidan) taunts Aidan and says he’s acting like a woman. (Um, thanks, says the show's largely female audience.) On a happier note, Victoria and Pasquale get engaged. Yay? Dude didn’t even get down on one knee though, so I’m not into it. But Victoria is, of course. They start planning for their wedding, which might happen in Corsica, because they are made of money.
Amanda, Aidan and Nolan hatch their new plan to take down the Graysons: Amanda will pose as a Homeland Security agent named Rebecca Stone. She assumes her new identity once Pasquale is kidnapped by Aidan and brought to a holding chamber, claiming that she’s been digging for info for the past three years and that he’s the missing link. Once she confiscates his phone, they use it to look up some audio on his computer and learn that Pasquale lied to Conrad about some stuff (further proving his shadiness and two-faced-ness).
Elsewhere, Charlotte gets a creepy letter that she thinks is from her dad, David. Oh, barf. If this show is really resorting to turning its one truth — David Clarke is dead — on its head, I’m done. They seem to explore every plotline possible, but this one is sacred. ANYWAYS. She takes the letter to her mother, who hasn’t even told her own daughter that she’s engaged (she does eventually). Then she takes the letter to Jack, who’s single now, and he tries to tell her that her dad is dead, but she’s not convinced. He has a way of maybe finding out for sure though.
Conrad tells Victoria about Oscar’s murder two weeks ago, which plants some doubt in Victoria’s mind about her betrothed. Back in the holding cell, Amanda asserts her authority over Pasquale, telling him she knows of his guilt and that he made millions off the bombing just like Conrad. Things get a bit out of hand when she slaps him (very unprofesh), but she eventually gets him to commit to getting a confession from Conrad (and maybe Victoria) before she ends up going to Margot with the intel.
Pasquale is freed from his sterile chamber and meets Victoria back at Grayson Manor, a bit unnerved, naturally. Victoria senses something is wrong, especially when he says he’s tired of America (hater) and wants to head to Paris ASAP. When he goes to shower she snoops through his coat, because this is the start of a trusting relationship, and finds the card that “Rebecca” left him. Victoria calls the number on it, realizes it’s the feds and freaks. Why would Pasquale snitch without telling her? Victoria confides in Daniel about her shady husband-to-be.
Jack uses Nolan to track the letter Charlotte got. He connects it to a cabin in the Berkshires owned by a man named Kurt Renner. Nolan doesn’t know just why he needed to track this letter though.
Daniel tells his dad that he’s having Pasquale extradited for “cooking Voulez’s books,” and that his mom is dumb for trusting him. But he still likes Margot, it seems, and he wants her to give the presentation at the “Revenge” fete of the evening™, the launch of MyClone.
Like normal human beings, Jack and Charlotte break into that random cabin in the Berkshires to search for intel on who sent that letter. They don’t find anyone there, but they find a lot of press clippings about David Clarke (and a book about the case). Jack reassures Charlotte that it’s just some creep and they leave. But after they leave, a man enters through another room. It’s not David (too young), but maybe a secret son? Readers, who do you think this strange new character is? Here is what he looks like, in case you forgot:
Kurt Renner, is that you? Also, this actor dude's name is Linc Hand. Yeah. Credit: ABC/Richard Cartwright
So Margot gets a formal contract from her dad to be the next CEO, and it’s time for the “Revenge” fete of the evening™. At the MyClone launch, Nolan is wearing an outrageous tie-dye blazer, but the poor guy is left off the list (that’s what getting on the MyClone founder’s bad side will do to ya). Of course he worms his way in with Amanda and they watch as Pasquale introduces Margot, who brings up Daniel and Javier to showcase MyClone. They explain how it’s a social media avatar thingy that knows you better than you know yourself. Javier gives the crowd an example by showing an avatar, Charlotte, and asking what she wants for her birthday. When she answers “to get high,” everyone is a little uncomfortable, but Javier cracks a joke and the crowd seems to get over it. But it doesn’t go over too well when they pick a random girl from the crowd and ask her about her dream vacation. MyClone decides that would be Sarajevo, but this poor girl’s entire family was massacred there. Faux pas. Everyone’s horrified. Ah, yes, Nolan has of course rigged the setup so it would bomb on Javier. And that’s why you don’t mess with Nolan.
Also why you don't mess with Nolan: that jacket. Credit: ABC/Richard Cartwright
Pasquale, who’s wired, follows Conrad up to the roof of the building in hopes of getting a confession. A helicopter is there to bring Conrad back to the Hamptons (because the LIRR just won’t do). Pasquale says his past is haunting him, but Conrad’s all like, “that’s your problem, man.” It looks like he senses Pasquale is up to something … so much that HE PUSHES PASQUALE INTO THE HELICOPTER BLADES! Oh Jesus it’s a blood-splattering mess. Talk about a revolution, huh? Who knew the plane propeller’s motion would inspire this episode’s title? Anyway, Amanda of course sees the whole thing go down (note: Why doesn’t she just go to the cops now that she witnessed Conrad, ya know, MURDERING SOMEONE? She could come up with some stupid reason for trekking up that roof, and it would be all over for Conrad. Her plan would succeed. But somehow, I don’t think that’s how the writers of this show will concisely clean up this messy affair. I digress).
Victoria finds Conrad and Pasquale’s lifeless body and lets out a bloodcurdling scream. Well done, Madeline Stowe. Scenes like this remind me why you got a Golden Globe nod during “Revenge’”s first season. She tells the cops that Conrad’s alibi (Pasquale slipped) is a lie, but the pilot backs up Conrad. Poor Victoria. She thinks Daniel told Conrad about Pasquale’s intentions, and Daniel is all like, why aren’t the Homeland Security people freaking out now? Victoria guesses he’s onto something, but when she calls the Rebecca Stone number from Pasquale’s coat, it’s already been taken out of service. She freaks out realizing she’s been played.
Daniel stays by Margot’s side as she mourns her father, and starts getting texts about her being the new CEO. These people waste no time, eh? Elsewhere, Amanda and Aidan discuss their next steps, and Charlotte visits Jack at the Stoweaway. When she leaves, Jack fingers the ring he swiped from the cabin, which is engraved DC. Out the window, that shady cabin dude is staring in at him. Creepy! The episode closes with Charlotte walking on the beach … and then getting kidnapped! (Probably that creepy cabin dude, right? I mean, who else? Not Pasquale!)
Friends, what did you think of “Revolution”? I must admit, I thought this was one of the more exciting episodes in awhile. Probably because someone died. But now Charlotte’s life is in danger, and from the looks of next week’s episode, we’re gonna see the Graysons’ name crumble. Of course, this is “Revenge,” and that’s pretty much promised to us every week, so we’ll see. But I’ll see you back here next week!