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Calm, tranquility disappears when we need it most

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"Holidays are not a time for sitting around lonely."





A woman’s world is never dull, but that doesn’t mean there can’t be peaceful, quiet times. In fact, peace, calm, quiet and tranquility are often just the things that women deprive themselves of when those are most necessary to recharge our batteries — mental and physical — to take on the challenges of our everyday lives.


And at this time of year, it’s all too evident — women are naturally go-getters, family organizers, party planners — and they forget to take time for themselves. Who can blame them? There’s an old saying that many rely on: "If you want to get something done, do it yourself."


Smart single women know that the holidays are not a time for sitting around lonely and moping, so they schedule lots of fun parties and events to keep themselves busy. That doesn’t translate to an expensive dinner every night. It can mean a movie night with a good buddy, late afternoon tea with a best girlfriend to catch up, or just a mellow dinner at a friend’s house.


But taking a night to yourself — perhaps with a relaxing glass of wine, an oil-enhanced hot tub, a facial mask if you like, and a good book — is just as important for staying in touch with yourself and keeping a sense of balance in your life. Even if you take an hour to update your chequebook, pay some bills, or catch up on personal e-mails, that quiet time of calm, can give you extra energy for the upcoming days and nights when you may need it.


For those women who have partners, it often means double the commitments at holiday time. That involves two sets of family events, office parties, and that many more friends to get together with. A night in, with or without your partner, can be very healthy. Together, a quiet dinner can spark romance, or cuddling in front of a movie at home can just be a time to connect. Alone, the other has the opportunity to go out with friends, and gives you the time to write your loved one holiday cards uninterrupted, or wrap those secret gifts you’ve been hiding under the bed.


When it comes to mothers, well, their time is already so pulled in so many directions, that it’s often considered a gift to have even an hour alone.


Send your partner out for the afternoon with the little ones — there’s tons to do at this time of year, from skating to visiting Santa to taking them to one of the many kiddie-friendly movie matinees. Then take advantage of that precious time. Again, write your cards, wrap your gifts, soak in the tub, take a nap, anything that can help you turn your mind from overload to relax mode.


A woman’s world is never dull — but most of us wouldn’t want it any other way.



letters@metronews.ca

 
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