Change.org petitions often get behind some pretty heavy stuff -- cancer battles, demands political dissidents be set free, drives for clean water in third world countries.

Now, we have the mother of all pushes: A petition to rename Boston’s iconic Leonard P. Zakim Bunker Hill Bridge in honor of our dearly departed One Direction member, Zayn Malik.

The petition went up Thursday morning and, so far, doesn’t have a helluva lot of co-signers -- just 8 by 9:30 a.m.

The creator of the petition to the Commonwealth of Massachusetts is listed as Matthew Shearer of Allston, Mass. Metro could not immediately confirm if that is the same Shearer who is a local radio personality.

Now, in case you’ve not been following all this, Malik is not dead. He’s just decided to leave the international sensation that the pop group, One Direction, has become.

"I'd like to apologize to the fans if I've let anyone down, but I have to do what feels right," he wrote on his Facebook page.

The news sent fans into a crying, screaming, wallowing tizzy.

Bizarrely, Shearer wants to do a mashup of names for the bridge.

“It's now time for the Commonwealth of Massachusetts and the Massachusetts Department of Transportation to do what feels right: Rename our beloved bridge to honor both Leonard P. Zakim, a local civil rights pioneer, AND Zayn Malik, an international pop-culture icon.”

The new name? The "Leonard P. Zayn Malik Bridge."

The one comment supporting the proposal is as over-the-top as the idea itself.

It’s by Kiara Tamanini, of Braintree, Mass., who correctly notes that Zayn’s birth name is actually Zain -- with an “i.”

“I'm signing this petition because Zain Malik, formally known as Zayn Malik, has sacrificed so much for the people that have made him successful. But, truthfully so, the media, the public, and Modest! Management have stripped him of his happiness. They have ripped away all of who Zain really is. Congrats, they got what they wanted; a pop star. However, it came with the cost of a heartbreaking sadness,” she posted.

Oy. Kids.