When you move in together, what you lose in mystery you make up for in intimacy. But lack of mystery can kill romance and passion. So here are five steps to make sure living together doesn’t ruin good lovin’.

Be courteous

People often assume that manners are meant to govern the interactions of strangers and acquaintances rather than live-in lovers. Politeness gets a bad rap, as if it’s some kind of veneer that’s meant to wear away as we get to know each other. But actually, good manners are the foundation of a happy home, too. And we all know what a happy home leads to hot, dirty sex. So say your pleases and thank yous.

Compliment each other

It’s all about not taking each other for granted. Remember those compliments you used to dole out when you first dated? You probably expected compliments back then, and may have barely even noticed them (plus, you just assumed the giver was trying to get into your pants). But now, in the throes of cohabitation (when the sex is on tap … one would hope), the simplest compliment gets a lot more mileage. Just try it next time you’re about to open your mouth to ask where the hell your sneakers are.

Live up to the compliments

Should your partner return the favor (and we reckon he or she will because compliments are contagious), you should strive to live up to the praise, rather than sinking into it.

Still spend time prepping

We’re not saying you should abandon your favorite pair of sweatpants — after all, hanging out in your comfy TV outfit is one of the prime benefits of cohabitation. But commitment is not a free pass to slobbery. Don’t stop going to the gym or surprising your partner with a home-cooked Rachael Ray dinner just because you’re no longer competing on the free market.

Make quality time

Sharing hang space and cleaning your teeth at the same time each morning doesn’t count as quality time. Sure, it’s fun to eat in front of the TV as an occasional treat, but your mum was right: Dinners are meant for conversation (now take your elbows off the table and stop chewing with your mouth open!)