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The Week That Was

In honor of Valentine’s Day next week, we are extra bitter this week. No, this isn’t a cry for help. Just cutting onions.

‘New Starbucks Trenta cup holds an entire bottle of wine’
LAUGHINGSQUID.COM, FEB. 4
That should do me ‘til noon. Probably going to want some coffee afterward, too.


‘Does a clean kitchen lead to more sex?’

BLOGS.CNN.COM, FEB. 5
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice ... look, I’m not gonna clean the kitchen, ma.



‘Farmville for Dummies? Coming soon to a bookstore near you’

ARSTECHNICA.COM, JAN. 6
So ... Farmville, then?



‘Older adults excluded from clinical trials’

UPI.COM, FEB. 5
It’s probably the smell.



‘Male rights activist calls for Valentine’s Day boycott’

AOLNEWS.COM, FEB. 4
Single male rights activist, sounds like.



‘Love stunt ends in tragedy’

THELOCAL.DE, FEB. 7
It’s called marriage, folks.




‘Lawmaker credits Hooters for success’

SALON.COM, FEB. 8
Hooters, meanwhile, taking credit for themselves.



‘The shrinking American cubicle’

CNN.COM, FEB. 8
Inversely proportional to the size of its occupant.



‘Thief steals 300 pounds of beef’

NWFDAILYNEWS.COM, FEB. 7
It’s what’s for dinner. Forever.



“I’m less ‘get rich quick,’ more ‘go nowhere fast.’”



“I always err on the side of condiments.”



“I don’t fear the reaper — just ‘more cowbell’ jokes.”



“Nike is the No. 1 corporate sponsor of peer pressure.”

 
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