Statler and Waldorf, the crotchety Muppet critics, review their latest movie

Waldorf, left, and Statler strike a pose.

The return of the Muppets wouldn’t be complete without their constant critics, those perpetual balcony fixtures Statler and Waldorf, who’ve been hurling insults at Kermit the Frog and his gang since the beginning. The venerable old codgers weren’t doing a lot of press for “The Muppets,” but they did agree to speak with Metro. That doesn’t mean we could get a straight answer out of them, though.

Have you seen the new movie “The Muppets” yet? And if so, what do you think of it?

Statler: I loved the movie. Amy Adams is beautiful and funny. Jason Segel is hilarious. Chris Cooper makes a great bad guy. And the star cameos are amazing!

Waldorf: Yeah, but what about the Muppets?

Statler: I closed my eyes during those parts.

Waldorf: But the Muppets are in most of the movie. You kept your eyes closed for most of the movie?

Statler: Sure. That’s why I liked it so much.

What are you looking forward to in 2012?

Statler: The end of the Mayan Calendar.

Waldorf: Yeah, we were there when they first made it; we want to see how it ends.

Statler: We’re also looking forward to changing our socks.

Waldorf: Gee, you’re right. It’s an even number year. Time sure flies.

Statler: Oh, and we’re looking forward to waking up each day and not seeing our names in the obits.

Waldorf: Yeah, when you’re as old as us, “Today is the first day of what’s left of your life.”

Do you have any tips for our readers on how to celebrate the holidays this year?

Statler
: Spend the holidays with “The Muppets.”

Waldorf: Yeah! And keep ’em away from us!

S&W: Ho! Ho! Ho!


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