‘Slutcracker’ star talks ‘War on Christmas’ and the Megyn Kelly gaffe

WEKB_TrainSlut2_1220

Around this time of year, the little ones wonder if Santa Claus is real. For those of us unfortunate enough to have achieved intellectual maturity, the yuletide question changes to, “Is the War on Christmas real, or did Dick Cheney invent it in 1994 in order to frighten old people?” We sought the truth from Vanessa White — a.k.a. Sugar Dish — creator of the “Slutcracker” burlesque extravaganza that is currently at the Somerville Theatre for its sixth year. White said the War on Christmas is not an actual thing. However, we determined that the Slutcracker is enough of an actual thing to garner national press and, in some circles, become about as famous as the Tchaikovsky pageant it echos.

What does it mean when the satire starts to become as well known as the original?

I don’t take a poll or anything, but it definitely seems like most people who come to see the Slutcracker don’t know the Nutcracker. Like, they know of it, but they’ve never seen it and they’re not familiar with the story, which is really interesting.

Megyn Kelly recently insisted that Santa Claus is white. As head honcho of the “Slutcracker,” therefore an authority on Christmas, do you think she was right?

My personal opinion of that is Santa Claus is not a real person, so why are we even talking about this? My show, sort of, um, I mean, the setting is Christmas, but that’s only because the “Nutcracker” is. It has to do with a woman finding her sexual self, and it happens that the beginning of the show happens to be at a Christmas party, but we don’t get into anything Christmasy.

Sarah Palin just put out a book about the War on Christmas. Do you think she’d appreciate the giant candy cane dong in your show?

Oh, I’m sure she’d hate it. Well, publically, she’d hate it. Her handlers would call it an abomination and all these fancy buzzwords people like to throw around concerning anything sexual or what some people would consider “deviant” lifestyle choices or whatever….in 2013.

Did you hear about the dudes in NYC doing a musical about Jesus’s crucifixion using only Britney Spears songs? What if you had to pick a pop star and a Bible story to combine into a show?

Well, Beyonce’s album just dropped, and it’s amazing. She speaks a lot about her personal experiences of coming into fame and celebrity and all that. I suppose I could lend her voice to the Book of Job, because it’s all about how, I guess, in order to earn love and success and whatever, you have to go through sacrifice and struggle.



News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
Local

FDNY debuts new fire simulator for blazes at…

The New York City Fire Department christened its newest, state-of-the-art, custom-built simulator at its training academy on Randall's Island Tuesday.

Local

Bronx cop saves baby who stopped breathing

A Bronx police officer is credited with saving the life of a 2-month-old baby who stopped breathing Tuesday morning. Police Officer Johnny Castillo, 38, was…

Local

Brewer celebrates Women's Equality Day with voter pledge

Manhattan Borough President Gale Brewer celebrated Women’s Equality Day Tuesday by pledging to register at least five women voters before the Oct. 10 deadline. Brewer…

Local

NYPD looking for lewd D train rider

The NYPD is enlisting the public’s help to find a man they say performed a lewd act on the D train Saturday evening. The incident…

Television

'Pretty Little Liars' recap: Season 5, Episode 12,…

If you've wondered whether Ali and Bethany knew each other, you got an answer tonight: Yes, and in a very tangled way. But many lingering…

Entertainment

Cymbals Eat Guitars Have Everything to 'LOSE'

At its most basic level, a rock band can be thought of as a family, a group of people selflessly devoted to a cause. When…

Entertainment

"Bachelor in Paradise" recap: Episode 4, 'Week Four'

Some things are hard to watch in a “Human Centipede” sort of way. Other things in an “American History X” sort of way. Does “Bachelor…

Movies

Fall Movie Preview: 10 films to see this…

Despite being awards season, the next four months bring a glut of remakes, rehashes and sequels. Here are 10 that should be better worth your time.

College

When are 2014 college football playoffs? (Schedule, date,…

When and where are 2014 college football playoffs? A look at the schedule, date, TV, time for the semi-finals at championship game.

NFL

Dimitri Patterson suspended only for rest of preseason…

Dimitri Patterson ended up getting just a slap on the wrist.

Sports

Eugenie Bouchard excited for 'rowdy' fans at US…

Eugenie Bouchard is sure to endear herself to New York's tennis faithful as she tries to win her first grand slam title across the next two weeks.

MLB

MLB Power Rankings: Angels and A's still at…

MLB Power Rankings: Angels and A's still at top, Nationals climb

Wellbeing

Who is having the most orgasms?

  Single lesbians report having orgasms more often than heterosexual women but both gay and straight men still come out on top of the climax…

Home

Jonathan Adler shares his tips for a great…

Jonathan Adler took a break from boogie boarding at his beach house to tell us how to keep that Labor Day party festive.

Travel

Most popular Labor Day weekend destinations

Priceline.com released its Top 20 destinations for the end of summer, including Labor Day weekend. If you’re heading to any of these spots, expect a…

Wellbeing

Working your way to type 2 diabetes: Job…

When it comes to type 2 diabetes, a stressful job can be as risky for your health as a bad diet and no exercise. A…