‘Supernatural’ Season 9 Episode 6 Recap: ‘Heaven Can’t Wait’
The episode opens with a guy about to off himself. But he can’t do it. Good call, guy. Uh oh – he’s probably not going to live much longer anyway. A strange man with a cross earring approaches and off-screen, poor suicide guy gets blown up by a magenta light.
In the light of day, Castiel has a job at a gas station. He’s awkwardly trying to adjust to doing all the things that humans do. His pretty boss comes in and tells him he’s not like the other associates — he’s special. She asks him out on a date. He’s happy and bewildered. Those blue eyes bring all the girls to the yard.
Back at the Men of Letters bunker, Kevin’s hitting a wall deciphering the angel tablet. Footnotes, cuniform, dead languages – you know, the usual SAT prep. The Winchesters try to help him do research. Dean’s saved by the phone ring – Cas calls to tell him their might be a case in the town he’s in. Dean lies to keep Sam behind and away from Cas so that Ezekiel doesn’t bail. It’s a little like having two ex-girlfriends, isn’t it, Dean?
Sam decides to ask Crowley for help translating the dead language that Kevin translated the tablet into. The softball Winchester brother tries to play hardball and threatens to turn Crowley over to Abaddon. Neither party is impressed with the other.
Not far from suicide guy’s cabin of demise, a high school girl who just got dumped declares she “just wants to die” — and evil earring dude obliges.
Dean shows up to investigate the suicide guy’s crime scene. He’s the fourth unhappy person to die in a flurry of atomized body parts. Ugh. Organic magenta spray paint. Dean shows up at the gas station. Dean makes fun of how much the once-mighty have fallen, but Cas defends himself. Suck it, Dean. Cas says he’s a failure as an angel but at least he can try to succeed as a human. Dean tries to convince him to come along with the investigation. Cas agrees reluctantly – once he cleans the bathroom.
Cas and Dean investigate the high school crime scene. The dead girl’s friend she was “kinda bummed,” but no more so than any other girl who just got dumped. Cas says he recognizes the MO as from a type of angel that would kill mortally wounded angels on divine battlefields out of mercy – completely, utterly destroy. Cas thinks the rogue angel is trying to do with the humans what he did for the angels, but that he doesn’t understand that human pain is a lot less permanent than angel pain, and that an angel who just came to earth can’t possibly understand how humans work. Cas admits he doesn’t want to go with Dean because he’s scared and wants to live a normal life. Sure. Because Cas never, ever has hidden reserves of bravery.
Back at the bunker, Crowley wants a “telephone call” in return for decrypting the translation. Sam and Kevin reluctantly agree. Crowley wants Kevin’s blood to perform the contact spell. Neither guy is going for it, but they’re just desperate enough to finally agree. His Infernal Majesty tries to contact Abaddon, but apparently he no longer wields any power in Hell.
Despite his better judgment, Dean tries to give Cas some dating advice. Aw, little Cas goes on his first date — only to find out that his foxy manager wanted him to babysit, not to date. Aw. Poor Cas. He cut a rose and everything. Cas tries a rock ‘n’ roll lullaby. It works. Cas admits to the baby that they’re in the same position – they’re both new at the whole human thing. He figures out the baby has a bit of a fever and overreacts, calling the mother over and over, to no response.
Dean finds out the husband of the first vaporized victim wasn’t actually killed – he’s missing. Turns out, the husband was a big Buddy Boyle fan. He realizes the husband is the same guy he saw parked in front of manager lady’s house. Dean manages to tell Cas, but it’s too late. The guy, now the vessel of the angel Ephraim, shows up. Cas tries to convince the angel that he just doesn’t understand the nature of human suffering, but the angel is heaven-bent on ending it all. And he wants to end Cas’s pain first. Turns out, he used to be a Cas fan, and he’s pretty angry that the divine trenchcoat ran off just when the angels needed him most.
Crowley finally gets ahold of Abaddon, only to find out she’s been taking souls before their time, and voiding his contracts. Crowley chews her out but she tells him he’s old news. He’s got nothin.’ He hangs up and agrees to do the translations — which reveal Metatron’s spell is irreversible.
Dean bursts in to save Cas, but Ephraim overcomes him pretty easily. Dean tosses Cas the angel sword and Cas ganks Angel Kevorkian. Foxy manager comes back and tells Cas that the part of him that overreacted to the baby’s fever, the part that cares so much, is what makes him special.
Sam tells Dean the bad news, but Dean decides not to tell Cas that his mistake can’t be undone. Cas second-guesses his own decision to lead a normal life, but Dean tells Cas the angels aren’t his problem anymore. Cas isn’t so sure.
Meanwhile, in the bunker, Sam realizes Crowley stole a syringe and is doing something to his own blood. Duh, duh, duh. Seriously, just do him in already, Sam.