New York

4 tips to find a date for Valentine’s without looking like a stalker

Here are four tips from sex counselor Ian Kerner on finding a date for Valentine’s Day. It all comes down to you feeling sexy and bold. As long as you’re more extroverted and flirtatious than you normally would be, then there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be getting some.

1. Look out and loiter.
“During the day, spend more time loitering in social areas such as where you go for lunch or the coffee bar in case you catch someone’s eye. At work, hang out by the water cooler or in the kitchen a little longer. If you have a gym membership, go there in extra cute workout clothes so as to grab the attention of the hottie running on the next treadmill. If there’s someone on the subway you find cute and they’re reading a book, spark up a conversation by asking them a question about it.” 

2. “Fleet” (flirty tweets). “Do something cute or clever via Twitter or Facebook. Tweet or update your status to something along the lines of ‘cooking for one’ tonight, any suggestions for a menu :)’. Who knows, someone … could write back, ‘hey, let’s cook for two’.” 

3. The (s)ex factor. “Look through your e-mails or phone and see if anyone rings any bells like an ex, a sex buddy or someone you have a crush on and with whom you know it’ll be just for the night. It’s not a bad thing to reach into the past a little bit as long as it’s all done in the spirit of fun and that you’re not getting yourself into any sort of emotional entanglement.”

4. Sexy and spontaneous. “Organize a spontan­eous night out for anyone that doesn’t have a sweetie tonight. A lot of venues such as galleries or bars have things geared towards single people on Valentine’s Day so it’s not too hard to etch out last minute plans. Once you’re out, start dancing or chatting with someone you wouldn’t normally approach.  It helps to have a friend as being two makes you feel more at ease and you’ll be more approachable. Be each other’s wing (wo)man and laugh about it if things go wrong. 


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