Mohammad Ashan: Taliban outlaw turns himself in to claim reward on ‘Wanted’ sign

Stupid criminal stories just never get old, do they? Today’s tale takes us overseas to Afghanistan, where Mohammad Ashan saw his own face on a “Wanted” poster and decided to do something about it — not run, not hide, but turn himself in — in exchange for the $100 reward advertised on the sign.

Yes, Ashan could have used the money so he figured it was an easy way to get the quick hundred bucks, we assume. As the Washington Post reports, Ashan, who was wanted for plotting attacks on security forces, approached police in the district of Sar Howza, clutching the poster that bared his face. He was, obviously, arrested immediately by several confused officers.

When U.S. troops approached Ashan to confirm that the man on the poster was indeed him, he replied, “‘Yes, yes, that’s me! Can I get my award now?’” according to SPC Matthew Baker.

Troops ran a biometric scan to confirm Ashan’s identity. One U.S. official told the Washington Post that Ashan is the equivalent of one of the “Home Alone” burglars.

Another official said, “Clearly, the man is an imbecile.”

And in the end, Ashan didn’t even get his hundred bucks.