Dating: How to get laid and get paid

 

If a relationship in bed or in the office isn't giving you what you need, walk on.
If a relationship in bed or in the office isn’t giving you what you need, walk on.

Bad sex doesn’t magically happen. Fear of inadequacy, limited skills, distaste for confrontation and passivity are but a few among many identifiable afflictions that could jeopardize your orgasms. It’s worth noting the behaviors that make your genitals frown could also decrease your paycheck. I’m not going to explain why you might suck in bed. Quite the opposite; I want you to have a better sex life. And you deserve more money. Whether you wish to be properly paid or laid, the secret could lie with improving your ability to negotiate for yourself.

And that starts with recognizing your self-worth. Confidence is strongest when based on what we believe to be fact. People who think they are beautiful exude higher self-esteem, regardless of height, thigh width, hair length or other physical traits. Likewise, when you know the value of your contributions to the workplace and can communicate them effectively, it’s easier to ask for a raise. So do it!

Do your research:

Get Laid: DO read credible articles, books, and advice columns. Listen to podcasts, and talk with your doctor. When it comes to sex, more information is better.

Get Paid: DO use an online salary calculator to estimate what peers at similar companies earn. Adjust upward for years of experience, degrees, and company size.

Communicate and listen to needs:

Get Paid: DO remember that salary is only one aspect of compensation. Include flexible hours, more vacation days or other perks in the conversation about your employment needs. Also pay attention to what your employer needs from you.

Get Laid: DON’T expect your lover to read your mind. Be vocal inside and out of the bedroom. Also, pay attention to what your lover is looking for.

Walk away if you need to:

Get Paid: DON’T remain with an employer who is either unable or unwilling to adequately compensate your work. If you have to find a better match and break up with them over it, seriously consider it.

Get Laid: DO Realize you are worth more than your most horrible relationship. Stay solo when necessary because your own company is better than bad company.

DAT_TwannaHines_0522

— Twanna A. Hines is an award–winning educator and sex columnist. She has contributed to CNN, NPR, Sirius, Lifetime, Mashable, Nerve, Fast Company magazine, CBC (Canadian National Radio), Paris Première (French television) and Al Jazeera. She’s online at FUNKY BROWN CHICK®, and you can follow her on twitter @funkybrownchick.

 


News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
International

Sierra Leone Ebola patient, recovered from family, dies…

An Ebola patient whose family sparked a nationwide hunt when they forcefully removed her from a treatment center and took her to a traditional healer has died.

Local

VIDEO: Cop reassigned as NYPD investigates alleged head…

An officer alleged to have stomped on a Brooklyn man's head last week had his gun taken away and placed on modified duty.

National

New York Times calls for legalization of pot

The New York Times editorial board on Saturday endorsed a repeal of the federal ban on marijuana, becoming the largest paper in the nation to back the idea.

National

Two injured after cable snaps on Ohio amusement…

(Reuters) - A cable on a large swing ride at an Ohio amusement park snapped and struck two riders as the swing was in motion,…

Music

Newport Folk Festival: Photo gallery of 35 moments…

As has been the tradition since Bob Dylan plugged in a bajillion years ago, the Newport Folk Festival embraces more musical genres than its name implies.

Music

MKTO: Behind the bromance

MKTO's Malcolm Kelley and Tony Oller talk about the American Dream tour, Demi Lovato and getting turned down by girls.

Arts

James Earl Jones and Rose Byrne head to…

Two-time Tony winner James Earl Jones returns to the New York stage next month as an eccentric grandfather in a revival of the 1930s comedy…

Movies

Box office: Scarlett Johansson wins battle of brains…

Scarlett Johansson's "Lucy" handily dispatched with Dwayne Johnson's "Hercules" over the weekend.

MLB

Yankees GM Brian Cashman breaks down art of…

The action frequently accelerates as the non-waiver trade deadline approaches, as it will on Thursday.

Auto racing

Jeff Gordon captures fifth title at Brickyard 400

Jeff Gordon captures fifth title at Brickyard 400

NBA

LeBron James will return to No. 23 in…

LeBron James is doing his old fans, if not the NBA, a favor. The Cavaliers forward will go back to his old No. 23 from…

Sports

Kevin Love becomes third NBA player to pull…

Kevin Love of the Minnesota Timberwolves became the third NBA player to withdraw from consideration for Team USA in next month's World Cup, USA Basketball.

Education

Are liberal arts colleges turning away from the…

Bryn Mawr College, a small women's college located just outside of Philadelphia, announced last week that it would be making standardized tests like the SAT…

Education

Recent grads discover school superintendent plagiarized parts of…

  Two recent high school graduates made a surprising discovery about the commencement speech their school superintendent delivered at their graduation: portions of it was copied…

Career

Feeling stuck? Get out of the entry-level job…

Television and movies may be littered with 20-something characters who seem directionless when it comes to their careers, but author Mary Traina says she finds…

Style

Cara Delevingne's major fashion faux-pas

Find out why the outfit Cara Delevingne wore to Leonardo DiCaprio's charity gala raised eyebrows.