Ask Funky Brown Chick: Help! I want my girlfriend to watch

It's important that everyone is comfortable with what goes on in the bedroom.
It’s important that everyone is comfortable with what goes on in the bedroom.

I have this thing where I want my girlfriend to watch me masturbate and give encouragement. Is that strange?

Sex is not a multiple choice test with a single right answer. The possibilities for pleasure are endless. Knowing what turns you on and wanting your partner to be part of that can be a sign that you are in touch (pun intended) with your desire. Besides, who the hell passes up an opportunity to watch someone masturbate? Wait. Scratch that. Lots of people do. Maybe your girlfriend is in that group, maybe she is not. In either case, this is my advice.

Remember this: masturbation is good

It doesn’t (usually) exchange babymaking fluids or give anyone an STD. Do it to relieve stress. Give yourself an orgasm. Learn how and where you like to be touched. Hell, use it as a form of foreplay or enjoy it as a means to it’s own deliciously-tugged end.

Find out if she likes watching you drown your goose.

You did not mention whether or not you asked your girlfriend if she wants to watch. If you haven’t, start that conversation by letting her know you want her to boss you around while you hacerse una paja because it gets you hot. Tell her you want to share that feeling with her.

Don’t be discouraged if she isn’t into it.

There is no need to feel rejected before you even rubbed one — or, technically, approximately 300 million little swimmers — out. Ask what turns her on to find a mutually-pleasurable route to joint fun.

Learn to compromise or collaborate to find a form of self play that works for both of you.

Couples are rarely 100 percent in synch about all aspects of their relationship. When your playmate isn’t into a particular playtime activity, take time to explore something else that works. See this possibly mismatched desire for what it is: An opportunity to expand your sexual creativity.

Twanna A. Hines is an award­-winning educator and sex columnist. Follow her on Twitter @funkybrownchick.



News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
National

Pioneers for domestic violence push on

Reporter was commissioned to write this in-depth article. Two decades have passed since the O.J. Simpson trial captivated the country. But in the 20 years…

Local

Newest java joint in bastion of hipness is…

Little may represent the change the neighborhood is undergoing right now like the arrival of the first Starbucks. The chain which is ubiquitous in Manhattan, opened a Williamsburg store at…

National

Black and white are the new orange at…

By Brendan O'Brien(Reuters) - Black and white are the new orange in a Michigan county where the sheriff has made a wardrobe change for jail…

National

Traps set after reports of giant snake on…

New Jersey animal control workers have set traps to snare a reported 20-foot-long serpent slithering through the waters of Lake Hopatcong.

Music

Avey Tare's Slasher Flicks more accessible than Animal…

Believe it or not, Avey Tare — the man in the mustachioed mask pictured here in the pool of blood — may have made the poppiest music of his career.

Entertainment

‘The Leftovers’ recap: Season 1, Episode 4, ‘B.J.…

Last week’s episode of “The Leftovers” was apparently a fluke, because this week’s episode returns to focusing on the Garveys and it is so boring.…

Movies

Interview: Luc Besson says 'Lucy' is very different…

Filmmaker Luc Besson talks about his new film "Lucy," how it's different than "Limitless" and his crazy first conversation with Egyptian actor Amr Waked.

Music

Weezer releases first new song since 2010

Weezer releases "Back to the Shack," their first new song in almost six years.

NFL

'Vicktory dogs' travel road to rehabilitation seven years…

Of the dozens of dogs groomed by Bad Newz Kennels, 48 were rescued and 22 of the pit bull terriers have emerged at Best Friends Animal Society.

MLB

Yankees looking at trade for Cliff Lee, according…

Yankees looking at trade for Cliff Lee, according to report

NFL

Giants lineman Chris Snee to retire: Reports

The Giants report to training camp on Tuesday, but Chris Snee may not be there when they do.

NBA

Carmelo Anthony talks about his charity work in…

As he is used to doing every year, NBA All-Star Carmelo Anthony is going to visit Puerto Rico to do work for his foundation.

Tech

RocketSkates let users roll with a motor

Los Angeles company Acton has raised funds on Kickstarter to roll out a nifty alternative – motor-powered "RocketSkates."

Tech

Knicks star Carmelo Anthony becomes a tech entrepreneur

He's been an All-Star, an Olympian, and a celebrity spokesperson. Now NBA player Carmelo Anthony is adding the position "tech entrepreneur" to his resume. Along…

Tech

Ulises 1 is the world's first singing satellite

A group of artists and engineers in Mexico have unveiled Ulises 1, the world's first opera-singing satellite.

Home

Wallscape on a budget

Skip the wallpaper and ombre an accent wall instead.