Join the mile high club: 5 tips from an author and former flight attendant

owen beddall mile high club qantas flight attendant
Want to join the mile high club? Here are five tips.
Credit: Owen Beddall

Oh, the mythical mile high club. Everyone has a friend of a friend who engaged in some hanky panky for some extra fun in-flight entertainment, but author Owen Beddall of “Confessions of a Qantas Flight Attendant” says joining the club is easier than you think. The former flight attendant to stars like Katy Perry and Cate Blanchett shared his secrets on knocking knees without causing too much turbulence.

1. Play it cool: “People sometimes are too obvious and try to over compensate for what they have planned,” says Beddall. “They will come up and tell you that they have to go into the toilet together for some absurd reason or they get too passionate and they think they have closed and locked the door when they haven’t.”

2. Be polite: Beddall says it’s not possible to catch every couple trying to get some action in the bathroom. “Sometimes you don’t catch them on the way in, but you may see them on the way back and it is very obvious,” he says. “Sometimes we look at these couples and think, ‘Wow, I might try and join in,’ but mostly we will turn a blind eye.” Beddall says there’s no need for a bribe, but be responsible: “It would be nice if you left the bathroom the way you found it.”

3. Buy a first class ticket: Granted, not everyone can afford to be in first class, but basically, these high-rolling passengers get away with a lot. “In first class, it’s pretty much do what you want,” explains Beddall. Shy passengers beware: “There are a maximum of 14 passengers and if two are away in the bathroom, it is very obvious.” Beddall says some particularly ballsy first class passengers even try to get in bed with each other: “Sometimes you have to stand over them and say, ‘Ahem … would you mind returning to your own seat?’”

4. Assume a good position: Obviously, space constraints make most sex positions impossible in the loo. Beddall has some suggestions: “Well I would say, the ‘squat and drop.’ where one person would have to sit on top of the other, or maybe doggy style at a stretch.”

5. Timing is key: Beddall says to have a game plan if you want to join the mile high club. “Pick your time,” he says. “So, when the plane is quiet and not in full service – pardon the pun – and lit up like Times Square. Also, please be discreet. Other than that, maybe try a few acrobatic moves and get your travel companion trained up as well.”

Follow Andrea Park on Twitter: @andreapark



News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
National

Pennsylvania police shooter manhunt near home of suspect's…

A police manhunt intensified on Friday for the gunman who killed an officer and wounded another in an ambush at a Pennsylvania police barracks a week ago.

Local

MAP: New York City street closures, September 19,…

The Department of Transportation and NYPD said there may be residual delays near all of the street closures on September 19, 20 and 21. There will be many streets and…

Local

MTA announces service changes for Sunday

The MTA has announced service changes ahead of Sunday's People's Climate March, which will be held from 11:30 a.m. to 4:30 p.m. Sunday. Riders using…

Local

NYPD launches Twitter account for L train

The NYPD recently launched a Twitter handle dedicated to the L train and its riders. According to @NYPDLtrain, officers went underground Thursday morning to hand…

Movies

Kevin Smith makes peace with the Internet

I was thinking about Ain't It Cool News and Harry Knowles last night, wondering if anyone from Ain't It Cool had reviewed my new movie…

Movies

Art imitates life in 'Swim Little Fish Swim'

There's a certain comfort to be taken in finding that young artists are still moving to New York and trying to make it — and…

Movies

Review: Terry Gilliam's 'The Zero Theorem' is better…

Terry Gilliam's latest, "The Zero Theorem," concerns a reclusive malcontent (Christoph Waltz) struggling with the search for the meaning of life.

Music

Esperanza Spalding and a being called Emily get…

Esperanza Spalding is about to spiral off in a brand new direction that may or may include an alter ego named Emily.

NFL

Oday Aboushi ready for increased role, and to…

Oday Aboushi might feel comfortable enough to engage in some trash talk the next time he is on the field.

NFL

Giants vs. Texans: 3 things to watch

The Giants host the surprising Texans (2-0) in what may already be a must-win game for Big Blue.

NFL

Eric Decker misses practice again, could miss Monday

Jets wide receiver Eric Decker missed practice Thursday as he continues to rehab a hamstring injury suffered last Sunday.

MLB

Derek Jeter still focused on baseball as final…

Derek Jeter has effectively hid his emotions for 20 years in the Bronx.

Parenting

A sneaky way to serve kids fruits and…

"My First Juices and Smoothies" gives smoothie recipes for kids.

Style

3 things we love from Day 1 of…

The highlights from Day 1 of Milan Fashion Week.

Sex

Why don't more couples use condoms?

  Call it the “condom moment.” That’s the name the authors of a new study have given to the pivotal conversation every couple should be…

Sex

Need an idea for a first date? Here's…

Picture your idea of a nice first date. Is it dinner and a movie? A visit to an interesting museum exhibit? Instead, an expert on…