New Jersey: So much more than one stereotype

I grew up just across the river from Lambertville, NJ, went to high school in Princeton and lived for four years in Jersey City. So, I consider myself a valid authority on all things Garden State.

So, when Metro learned a satirical map of the state (made by Rutgers grad Joe Stanfield) was going around, I took it upon myself to investigate, and pass judgment upon its accuracy. And there is good news: With the exception of one thing, the map is fairly accurate.

–Wildwood and pretty much all of South Jersey are filled with Philly trash.

–“Deliverance” could have been filmed in the Pine Barrens.

–I wouldn’t inhale too deeply around Linden.

–Camden is like Detroit, except imagine if the auto industry never happened. So, like, no jobs. Ever.

So far, so good. But look at the map below, and try to spot what’s wrong:

Did you find it? It’s this: Hipsters are anathema to Hoboken.

Do hipsters paint sparkly shamrocks on their faces and do Jager bombs with their friends from Rutgers on St. Paddy’s Day? Do hipsters wear NFL jerseys and root for the Steelers on Sunday afternoons? Do hipsters take the PATH to their finance/marketing/sales/PR job “in the city” every morning?

No.

And all of that happens in Hoboken.

See, everyone thinks New Jersey is the stereotype of fake-tanned, big-haired guidos you see on that MTV show. But we’re so much more than just one cliché, we are lots of stereotypes! Hill people, and Pineys and hybrid-driving lawyers. Just not hipsters. There are no hipsters in Jersey.



News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
National

Giant ketchup bottle up for sale in southern…

By Mary WisniewskiCHICAGO (Reuters) - Want a giant historic order of fries with that?A water tower shaped like a 170-foot-tall ketchup bottle is for sale…

Local

NYPD: Man denied money punches 65-year-old at Bronx…

A 65-year-old man was punched and shoved at a D train station in the Bronx last week when he denied another man money, police said.

Local

New York Governor Cuomo's office intervened in corruption…

New York Governor Andrew Cuomo's office meddled with a commission he created to root out corruption in state politics, pushing back whenever it focused on groups tied to Cuomo, the…

International

South Korea ferry fugitive found dead with bags…

By Ju-min Park and Sohee KimSUNCHEON/INCHEON South Korea (Reuters) - South Korea's most wanted man, whose heavily decomposed body was found in an orchard last…

Entertainment

One Direction fans celebrate four years of Harry…

Whether you love them or hate them — or if you say that you hate them and secretly sing along to their songs alone in…

Music

Jack White attends Cubs game, looks miserable

Jack White went to a Cubs game and got photographed looking really unhappy about it.

Music

Wiz Khalifa brings Dem Boyz to town for…

It’s well into the third year of Wiz Khalifa’s hip-hop- and herb-themed Under the Influence of Music tour. Along with Khalifa, this year's lineup features Jeezy,…

Books

Art imitates life (almost) in David Shaprio's new…

David Shapiro talks about his book, "You're Not Much Use To Anyone."

NFL

Fantasy football: Johnny Manziel could give your running…

Fantasy football: Johnny Manziel could give your running game a boost

NFL

3 storylines to watch as Jets open training…

Jets head coach Rex Ryan might be in for an even tougher job in 2014 after arguably his best coaching job last season.

NFL

David Tyree hiring has gay rights advocates angry

Former Giants Super Bowl hero David Tyree will re-join the franchise as its new director of player development.

NFL

Ben McAdoo's new offense has Giants excited to…

Even Tom Coughlin feels he has a lot to learn about offensive coordinator Ben McAdoo’s new offense, which makes the veteran coach very excited.

Style

How to dress like a socialite while sticking…

Nicky Hilton is releasing a new book about how to dress fabulously while sticking to a budget.

Parenting

The best Back-To-School Backpacks

Get ready for back-to-school with these stylish kids' backpacks.

Education

Elementary school students like their healthy school lunches…

When the federal government first rolled out its healthier school meal guidelines in 2012, elementary schoolers weren't happy. Much was written about how America's youngest…

Tech

Learn Braille with these gloves

U.S. scientists have designed high-tech gloves to help users understand Braille in a matter of minutes.