In DC, it’s a madhouse

08342c5b86bd5d5a27d65fb1fefc1671

The apes are back. The latest offering in the “Planet of the Apes” genre is swinging into movie theaters this weekend, and I couldn’t be happier.

Obviously, the first reason is that it gives me an excuse to dust off my Roddy McDowall impersonation. But the second is just as compelling: After weeks of watching members of Congress bare their teeth, pound their chests and break the furniture, I’m looking forward to the comfort of a fictional collapse of civilization. 

 And why not? The reality of our situation, especially after this past week, is far scarier than an invasion of horse-riding gorillas with nets and rifles.

Our economy remains a wreck. The grease fire of the deficit was beaten down before it could consume the kitchen, but it is still lashing at the fire blanket and ready to explode again at a moment’s notice.
The markets have been falling faster than D.B. Cooper, — and also, by the way, taking our cash with them. Confidence in our elected leaders has crumbled to dust. Gridlock used to describe the traffic in D.C.; now it is an overall state of being. President Obama seems unable to break through. Leaders in both parties are as hapless as my grandmother on a skateboard.   

I’ve been asking political types lately how this came to be, and they all seem as puzzled as Charlton Heston and his fellow astronauts in the original Apes film when they realized they had landed on a planet much like Earth, only with gibbons inexplicably running the show. These politicos agree that things are not as they should be in D.C., but they feel powerless to fix the situation. So they point fingers at each other and hurl accusations, and nothing changes.

To borrow a line from the film series: It’s a madhouse. And it is too much to contemplate.

So I’m going to the movies this weekend. I’m going to buy my popcorn, grab a soda and curl up in the darkness to watch the planet fall under the domination of an entirely different species. Hey, a boy can dream, can’t he?

– CNN’s Tom Foreman is a regular on “AC360°”/www.ac360.com and “The Situation Room.”



News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
Local

Federal mediator joins Met Opera labor talks as…

Unions representing the orchestra and chorus of the Met Opera agreed to have a federal mediator join labor talks on Thursday as a threatened lockout loomed.

Local

Winning $7 million New York lottery ticket sold…

The only $7 million winning New York Lottery ticket for Monday's Cash4Life drawing was sold at a Queens 7-Eleven, officials said on Tuesday.

Local

Brooklyn man charged in roommate's stabbing death

A Brooklyn man accused of violently stabbing his roommate to death on Monday is in police custody and faces murder charges.

International

Dinosaurs could have survived asteroid strike

It turns out there is a good and a bad time for the planet to be hit by a meteor, and dinosaurs were just unlucky.…

Movies

Review: 'Guardians of the Galaxy' is a refreshingly…

Marvel is sitting so high on a cash mountain that it's now thrown $170 million at the relatively obscure and very silly title "Guardians of the Galaxy."

Movies

Review: 'Get on Up' is a war between…

James Brown finally gets his own boring biopic with "Get on Up," but the Godfather of Soul puts up a good fight against the usual cliches.

Movies

Review: 'Child of God' finds director James Franco…

James Franco's 11th directed feature is a noble but sloppy adaptation of Cormac McCarthy's "Child of God," about a feral mountain man (Scott Haze).

Movies

Review: Alex Gibney's Fela Kuti doc 'Finding Fela'…

Prolific documentarian Alex Gibney takes on Afrobeat god Fela Kuti in "Finding Fela," but fails to capture his unique essence.

MLB

Yankees land Stephen Drew, Martin Prado at trade…

Yankees land Stephen Drew, Martin Prado at trade deadline

College

Playing the Field: Valentine's Day coupling edition

  It’s Valentine’s Day, a day created by Hallmark to make couples spend loads and loads of money on candy, flowers and gourmet dinners. Or…

MLB

Angelo Cataldi: Ryan Howard deserves better from Phillies

Just last week, Ryan Howard endured the embarrassment of a benching that was inevitable, and yet still shocking.

NFL

Larry Donnell has inside track in Giants tight…

Little-known Larry Donnell of Grambling State currently has the inside track, as the second-year player has received the bulk of the first-team reps.

Career

What do you wear to a career fair?…

Getting that gig starts with presenting the most polished and memorable version of yourself, so refer to our expert fashion advice.

Style

Editors pick: Margiela's finger armor ring

These cool rings from Maison Martin Margiela are designed to overlap over the finger, covering each joint like armor.

Style

Givenchy champions diversity

Riccardo Tisci's uses a variety of ethnically diverse ladies for his spring campaign including Erykah Badu.

Wellbeing

Don't settle for the hotel fitness center with…

Travelers who want to skip the hotel fitness center in favor of local gyms that may offer better equipment, classes and amenities can turn to…