‘Occupy Wall Street’: What do they want?

Occupy Wall Street: Because every protest is better with hashtags.

We know the protesters currently hanging out in downtown Manhattan are against Wall Street — that’s right in the name. But what are they for?

Let’s take a look at their Facebook page, which has a convenient poll where protesters (and anyone else with an Internet connection) can vote on their “one demand.”(If you say they should have decided on that ahead of time, well, hindsight…) What do they want? In order of popularity:

Revoke Corporate Personhood: Good point! It is sort of silly that corporations are people! We’re right there with you, we think.

End Corporate Welfare:
Well, what do you mean? Reduce tax loopholes? Sure, we get that. It’s outrageous the things these corporations do to avoid paying their fair share. But if you mean you don’t want any more bailouts, well… good luck hoping that the government was wrong about some companies becoming too big to fail.

Raise taxes on the top 2%!: As someone not in the top 2%, I say, heck yeah! If we’re going to get the deficit down, we’ve got the choice between enormously disrupting the lives of poor people, or mildly inconveniencing rich people. Let’s go with the latter.

Abolish capitalism: No.

Tax Wall Street:
Pretty sure this is happening already.

PUBLIC HEALTHCARE:
We’re in favor of this! Not sure what Wall Street can do about it, though.

Presidential Commission to Separate Money From Politics: Presidential Commission to Remove Dreams From Pipes.

End the wars, withdraw from Iraq, Afghanistan, Libya, Pakistan, Yemen, etc.: We don’t agree with this, but it’s a debate we should be having. Again, though, not so much to do with Wall Street.

Close half of America’s 1000 military bases:
We see where you’re coming from with this, but if unemployment is your big worry, shuttering 500 businesses is not the best idea.

Four-hour work day: Jesus. Go and confirm the stereotypes already.

DEMOCRACY NOT CORPORATOCRACY: OK! A little vague, but not bad. But stop shouting at us.

Resource-Based Economy: Yeah, this isn’t a video game. That’s not coming back, and you don’t want it to.

Legalize Marijuana: Of course.

Other less-serious goals, that may or nay not have been added by people affiliated with the protest:

–”A shrubbery”

–”Free the Unicorns!”

–”More Pies!”

–”Eat Bacon”

–”Make the letter ‘Y’ decide if it’s a vowel or a consonant!!!!”

And a good time was had by all.



News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
Local

Mayor reveals new tech hub Digital.NYC

Mayor Bill de Blasio revealed Digital.NYC on Wednesday, a new online platform aimed at connecting all things tech in New York City. The public-private partnership…

Local

Falling debris hits two men in Times Square

Two men were taken to the hospital Wednesday morning after being hit by falling debris from 110 feet above Times Square. Nancy Greco from the…

Local

Queens Assemblyman William Scarborough accused of misusing campaign…

Queens Assemblyman William Scarborough has been indicted on state and federal charges for allegedly withdrawing campaign funds as cash for personal use. Scarborough, a Democrat…

News

U.S. Secret Service director Pierson resigns under fire

U.S. Secret Service Director Julia Pierson resigned under fire on Wednesday after a series of security lapses came to light.

Television

TV watch list, Wednesday, Oct. 1: 'Criminal Minds,'…

The "Criminal Minds" team adds some supernatural assistance, as the "Ghost Whisperer" herself, Jennifer Love Hewitt, joins the show. She's playing an FBI agent, but you never know when someone…

Music

See the most popular Pandora station in your…

Who knew Bachata music was so popular?

The Word

The Word: Twilight just won't die

You thought our "Twilight" days were behind us, didn't you? Well think again. Series creator Stephenie Meyer (who would rather you not ask about "Twilight"…

Going Out

Which NYC restaurant lost its three-star Michelin rating?

A record 73 restaurants in New York City collected coveted Michelin stars on Tuesday as a mix of trendy spots and fine-dining stalwarts underscored the…

NFL

Rex Ryan fields more questions about Geno Smith,…

The idea Geno Smith will be replaced by backup Michael Vick appears to be all smoke, as the Jets are intent to ride with their second-round draft pick.

NFL

Will Beatty playing like franchise left tackle again…

Left tackle Will Beatty, who is the elder-statesman of Giants’ line, has turned around his season and become a consistent force on Manning’s blindside.

NFL

John Conner back with Jets for second stint

He'll be back. It's "Terminator 2" for the Jets, who brought back John Conner to the team on Tuesday after placing fullback Tommy Bohanon on…

NFL

Fantasy football: Ben Tate to break out, Larry…

Fantasy football: Ben Tate to break out, Larry Donnell will stay solid

Career

Creating a support system for minority women in…

When Kathryn Finney founded digitalundivided — an organization devoted to engaging minority communities with the tech world — she didn’t know quite what to expect.…

Sex

We can learn a lot from animals about…

There’s a lot we can learn about love from the birds and the bees — and the chickens, monkeys and squirrels that we share the…

Style

Saint Laurent

Our review of the Saint Laurent Spring '15 show at Paris Fashion Week.

Style

Céline: Paris Fashion Week Spring 2015

Our review of the Celine Spring '15 show during Paris Fashion Week.