Philadelphia

Playing the Field: Kim Kardashian’s sweaty dreams, Name your baby ‘Shabazz’

Stop toying with us, Kim.

Yup, you know it. I know it. The whole Playing the Field audience knows it. Serial athlete dater Kim Kardashian is teetering on the brink of irrelevancy. I mean, it’s a time-tested, proven fact that in Hollywood, flour bombs are more often than not the first step toward irrelevancy. After all, it happened once upon a time to Anna Kournikova, Zsa Zsa Gabor, Harold Minor, Charles Nelson Reilly and Hideo Nomo. Each and every one of them were floured into obscurity (links unavailable).

So while Kim K. is still (barely) hanging on to relevancy, we at Playing the Field offer up three potential athlete boyfriends for her to date over the next 60 days to keep her in the tabloids:

Tim Tebow – The obvious choice. His move to New York sets this up perfectly and would lead to the perfect quarterback love triangle between Kim K., Tebow and Mark Sanchez. Plus Kris Humphries, who is actually playing well on the floor for the Nets recently, is right next door. Who wouldn’t watch “Kim and Tim take The Meadowlands?”

Kobe Bryant – He’s single ladies and he just got benched. Who wouldn’t want to date a maniacal, me-first, wife-cheating sociopath that just happens to be one of the greatest players of all-time? (Hmm, Tiger Woods would also work here).

Plus it would bring the Kardashian drama back to its rightful home of LA.

Tom Brady
– The longest of long-shots but it’s a sure bet that Kim K. would give up half of her ‘thanks dad’ fortune for this type of mainstream drama. Imagine ‘The Tush’ squeezing its way between Gisele and Tom?

We know Brady can’t be happy with Gisele having thrown his favorite receiver under the bus immediately following the Super Bowl. Could that be the first step to a non-Gisele existence for No. 12? Not since his days of dating Tara Reid would Brady be stooping so low as to go the Kardashian route. But we all can dream.

Lame Twitter account of the week: Charlie Villanueva

Tweets we could have done without from the Pistons bust during the past seven days:

@CV31: That’s right Manning to Denver, so who starts Tebow or Manning? (read the papers, Chuck)

@CV31: “can’t worry about things I can’t control” (Diva alert)

@CV31: I’m about to go HAM (Mad Men fan or Hard as a MF’er?)

@CV31: I hate coming to the West Coast, sleeping patterns are messed up, just took a great nap, watching Shark Tank, great show (yup, we really feel for ya buddy)

In a related story, Villanueva has played in a grand total of four games this season, is averaging 1.3 points per game and is earning $7.5 million this season for the 16-32 Pistons.

Introducing Professor Gronk

Would you pay $7 to go see Patriots tight end and perennial NFL offseason MVP Rob Gronkowski give a speech at your local university?

Absolutely, as long as there’s a guaranteed after-party to go with it.

Plus, as we already know, Gronk has a way with words, no matter what language.

The name game

Apparently we missed the baby name memo, but it looks as though ‘Shabazz’ is the new ‘Michael.’

High school basketball phenom Shabazz Muhammad is well on his way to surpassing UConn’s Shabazz Napier as the No. 1 ‘Bazz in the land. He’s certainly a ‘Bazz, ‘Bazz man in the high school ranks and he nearly tore down the rim Monday at the Powerade Jam Fest in Chicago.

It’s now a fact. In the sports lexicon, Shabazz is easily taking the place of Antoine, Antwan, A’Toine, Antwon, Ant’Juan, Antone and Aunt-Juan (all of them so 2005) as the No. 1 sports name in whatever we’re calling this decade. Mark it down.

Stoudemire out with a bulging dick

Speaking of a change in sports lexicon, we think it’s about time to do away with the term ‘bulging disc’ when it comes to lower back injuries.

‘Bulging disc’ is much like the word ironic. No one knows what it means anymore. We should just always refer to ‘bulging disc’ as thisthis … and this:

As always, the sports broadcasting world is one step ahead of all of us.


News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
Gossip

Cannes festival hit by second suspected jewelry theft

A diamond necklace worth 2 million euros ($2.6 million) disappeared during a star-studded party

National

Boy Scouts of America delegates vote to remove…

The Boy Scouts of America approved a proposal on Thursday to end a ban on openly gay scouts.

National

INTERVIEW: Protester Medea Benjamin explains what it's like…

Long-time activist Medea Benjamin was at the center of attention Thursday after she repeatedly interrupted President Obama as he spoke about the U.S. drone policy and Guantanamo Bay.

National

President Obama heckled about Guantanamo Bay by protester…

A very loud woman stole the show several times as President Obama addressed a crowd of journalists during a press conference this afternoon. The apparent protester interrupted Obama several times,…

Entertainment

The Word: Well suited, May 23

No matter how you put it, we can all appreciate a man with great style.

Entertainment

'Trouble Will Find' The National, but they'll find…

Aaron Dessner is on drugs. The guitarist for The National had to push back this interview twice because he was visiting the doctor for a stiff neck.

Entertainment

Morgan Freeman takes a little nap during interview

We understand what it’s like during the afternoon, especially after lunch, where you just can’t keep your eyes open. It happens to use every day.

Entertainment

PHOTOS: The Word, May 22

Fire...and white was the theme for the May 22 edition of "The Word".

MLB

Chase Utley placed on 15-day DL

Chase Utley is out 2-4 weeks.

MLB

Kyle Kendrick opens series against Nationals

Phillies in D.C. for three-game set.

NBA

Jrue Holiday set to wed longtime girlfriend

Jrue Holiday is getting married in July.

MLB

Lee dominates, Phillies top Marlins

Cliff Lee had nearly as many hits as he allowed to the Miami Marlins Wednesday night.

Education

Sexual activities for the classroom

A new book seeks to help educators bring up the sometimes awkward discussions surrounding gender and sexuality.

Style

Street style: Milan

Oxana Ong, in a graphic neon skirt suit with high slit, stand out from the crowd.

Lifestyle

Editor's Pick: Explorer Yoga Bag

Perfect yoga bag for the man who loves downward dogs after work.

Food

Trainer to the stars Tracy Anderson launches meal…

The program began in LA and is going nationwide June 1