Philadelphia

Dating: How do you meet someone?

“Hey girl, can I take you out sometime?”
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Celebrities Eva Mendes and Ryan Gosling have been spotted together for a few months now, and there seems to be no question any longer that they are an item. Those lucky two got cozy when they were filming “The Place Beyond the Pines.” They make it look so easy, meeting on the glamorous set of a movie. But what can you do to meet someone if you aren’t gorgeous movie stars with instant chemistry?

The best advice I can give you is to think outside the box. Drop your preconceived notions and go out there with a completely open mind. Everyone typically has their “type” — whether it is tall, short, brown or blond hair, conservative or free-spirited —and thus instantly screens out people who they think aren’t it.

Instead of sticking strictly to what you know you like, be open to someone new and different and give yourself a chance to discover if, in fact, you might find something attractive or appealing in a person you previously would never have given a chance. You might even discover that you like a different “type” more. By increasing your options you will greatly increase your odds.

While doing that, look for and gravitate toward the positive energy — a nice smile, those who show they’re interested by asking questions about you, considerate behavior — rather than focusing on appearance alone.

And at least as important, keep a smile on your face. That’s a green light to starting up a conversation wherever you are — on the train, in a store, at a party. All it takes for chemistry to happen is for two people to simply click, which can begin with a few words. Take the initiative and ask questions. Show interest — and see if it is returned.

The quicker you find a common ground, the faster you are on your way to a new beginning. Welcome the unknown, and see who comes your way.

— Relationship expert Dr. Jane Greer is the creator of “Shrink Wrap” – national commentary on what we can learn from celebrity relationships – and host of “Let’s Talk Sex” at Healthylife.net. Her book, “What About Me? Stop Selfishness From Ruining Your Relationship,” is available nationwide.

Metro does not endorse the opinions of the author, or any opinions expressed on its pages.


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