Playing the Field: The sports chick Final Four

Suck it, Brittney Griner.
Suck it, Brittney Griner. (Photo: Getty images)

The Madness begins (for real, none of this First Four filth) on Thursday at noon when Greg Gumbel bumps the local news and then proceeds to infuriate all 29 fans of “The Young and the Restless.” It’s a few of the best few minutes of the year for any sports fan. Cliched for sure, but you truly get that “Christmas morning feel” around 11:59 a.m. on the first Thursday of the tourney.

One of the biggest storylines we’ll be following as soon as the Big Dance tips is, “Which female fan will steal the show, Katherine Webb-style?” during this year’s tourney. I just filled out my bracket and wittled my way down to a Final Four: Kate Upton out of the Anna Nicole Region, Katherine Webb herself out of the Kathy Ireland Region, Amanda Marcum out of the Brooklyn Decker Region and Juli Boeheim out of the Nina Hartley Region.

Kate Upton has always been associated with the sports world, because it seems that sports fans are the only people out there who truly appreciate her. Critics call her fat. We defend her. Critics say she’s dumb. We defend her. Critics wanted her to stop dating Justin Verlander. We put an end to that.

She seems to be gearing up for a big run this March, considering what has gone down the past few days. A teenage boy, who claims to be a huge nerd (that’s in these days, remember), asked Upton via a Youtube video if she would go to prom with him. Upton curiously responded via Twitter, tweeting to young Jake Davidson, “you can call me Katie if you want! How could I turn down that video! I’ll check my schedule.”

That’s right, if there’s one thing Upton knows how to do, it’s finding a way to stay relevant.

Katherine Webb’s fame is waning but if she can get on CBS cameras in the next few weeks and cause Jim Nantz to break code and not act like an alien, she could win our hearts all over again. Just confirming — we all know that’s still her role in American pop culture, right? … appearing at the biggest events in college sports and making old play-by-play men tingly?

In the relevancy category: Webb is starring on that diving TV show that I purposely forgot to watch.

Amanda Marcum is a sleeper, but she is about to endure one hell of a media ride. Marcum, a former Maxim cover girl and Victoria’s Secret model, is actually married to Florida Gulf Coast head coach Andy Enfield. Jake Davidson, take note: It is possible to land a major league woman even if you’ll always be a Birmingham Baron.

According to NaplesNews.com, Enfield and Marcum met when Oklahoma State was playing in Boston during the 2003 NCAA tournament. Marcum is a big Cowboys fan and Enfield, who was an assistant coach with the Celtics in the late ’90s, was introduced to her through a friend. Enfield actually gave Marcum a ride to the game, and the rest is history.

“I thought he looked like a great driver that would give me a free ride,” Amanda said jokingly. “And we had lots of things in common — especially sports — and we talked and talked about that. I thought he was really funny and very confident. And I’m a sucker for sports guys, obviously.”

Obviously.

Finally we get to Juli Boeheim. Yup, she’s like a team with three or four fifth-year seniors making it to the grand stage, but she’s a proven winner this time of year. On an annual basis, we all see her in the stands on TV and gaze in amazement at just how in the world Jim could have scored that. I’m sure it had nothing to do with him being a millionaire hoops coach.

She was a big deal when I was in college, but her fame has sadly plummeted (@JuliBoeheim has a whopping 328 Twitter followers) in recent years.

Here’s saying Juli’s got one more magical month left in her.

Matt Burke is sports editor and a columnist at Metro Boston. Follow him on Twitter @BurkeMetroBOS



News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
Local

Paint Nite: Get drunk and make a painting…

At Paint Nite, New Yorkers can drink and make a painting at a New York City bar.

National

Judge sets January start for murder trial of…

By Elizabeth BarberBOSTON (Reuters) - Former New England Patriots player Aaron Hernandez will be tried in January for the murder of semi-professional football player Odin…

National

Donut capers stymie police in Oregon

For more than a month, mysterious vandals have been smearing pastries on cars, depositing donuts in lawns and leaving cakes strewn about the streets.

International

U.S., European airlines halt flights to Israel due…

U.S. and European airlines halted flights to Tel Aviv in an effort to ensure passenger safety as turmoil in Israel and the region has intensified.

Arts

Don't miss 'Charles James: Beyond Fashion' at the…

Have you been meaning to see "Charles James: Beyond Fashion"? There are only two weeks left to get to the Met and catch this amazing American fashion designer's collection.

Television

Zac Posen talks 'Project Runway' and what it…

We talked to Zac Posen, judge and designer extraordinaire, about the new season of "Project Runway" and what keeps him coming back after three seasons.

Television

'Face Off' contestant David 'DOC' O'Connell sounds off…

David "DOC" O'Connell tells us about getting cast on Season 7 of Syfy's "Face Off," premiering tonight at 9.

Arts

PHOTO: Wildlife photographer Marc Mol captures amazing aerial…

This aerial image was taken by photographer Marc Mol who spotted the animals during an air safari in Zambia.

MLB

MLB Power Rankings: A's, Angels, Dodgers, Brewers lead…

MLB Power Rankings: A's, Angels, Dodgers, Brewers lead pack

NFL

2014 NFL season betting odds: Which team will…

2014 NFL season betting odds: Which team will win Super Bowl?

NFL

5 players to watch at Giants training camp

Metro takes a look at five players who will be on everyone’s mind when Giants training camp gets underway.

NFL

'Vicktory dogs' travel road to rehabilitation seven years…

Of the dozens of dogs groomed by Bad Newz Kennels, 48 were rescued and 22 of the pit bull terriers have emerged at Best Friends Animal Society.

Tech

Learn Braille with these gloves

U.S. scientists have designed high-tech gloves to help users understand Braille in a matter of minutes.

Home

5 New Ikea products that will change your…

We round-up the latest must-have products.

Food

Recipe: Wolfgang Puck's Buttermilk French Toast

We recently spent some time chatting with restauranteur/celebrity chef Wolfgang Puck at his Wolfgang Puck American Grille in the Borgata in Atlantic City. Puck wanted…

Style

Go retro with your sneakers

The best of wacky new sneakers.