The Miami Dolphins lead the NFL in sex and don’t apologize for it

Here’s a hunch: the Miami Dolphins aren’t going to win the Super Bowl this year.

But they already have the edge over the rest of the NFL in a much more monetarily efficient category: sex.

It sells, so says my friend in marketing.

Today’s Miami Dolphins cheerleaders deserve every bit the publicity as the Dallas Cowboys cheerleaders of the 1970s, though they won’t get it – mainly because in the 1970s there was no Internet and, in turn, no porn at your fingertips.

Even so, the Dolphins are blatantly trying to get fans to come to beaten down Sun Life Stadium, XFL-style, by cramming their so-hot-they’re-nearly-not-suitable-for-work cheerleaders down their fans’ throats. They are doing so by putting out these music video parodies of popular songs (see above). Now, that’s certainly not an original idea. In fact, it’s an overdone idea.

But the Dolphins deserve points here for NOT trying to be creative. Much like the “Blurred Lines” music video itself, it just has smoking hot girls dancing around. Meow.


The ’Fins did the same a year ago with Carly Rae Jepsen’s “Call Me Maybe” video. No “clever” hand-motions seen in other Jepsen parodies. Just straight girls in bikinis dancing and lip-synching.

My only quibble is the timing of this “Blurred Lines” parody. “Blurred Lines” has been out since May. It was the “song of the summer.” Summer is over. It’s football season. I suppose they could always dance to this:

Follow Metro Boston sports editor Matt Burke on Twitter @BurkeMetroBOS



News
Entertainment
Sports
Lifestyle
National

Mutant worms stay sober, even on alcohol

U.S. researchers have developed "mutant worms" that do not get drunk by alcohol, a breakthrough that could lead to new treatment for people trying to quit drinking

Local

K-9 nose helps capture $150K in cocaine at…

A furry, four-legged security agent helped authorities stop an illegal cocaine shipment from sneaking past JFK customs.

National

Minnesota man asked to leave Southwest flight after…

A man and his two sons were asked to leave a Southwest Airlines flight after the man sent a tweet complaining about being treated rudely by a gate agent.

National

Man sues hospital after surprise penis amputation

An Alabama man who went in to a hospital last month for a circumcision awoke after surgery to find his penis had been amputated, his lawyer said on Thursday.

Movies

Review: Brett Ratner's big 'Hercules' movie is small…

The latest "Hercules," starring Dwayne Johnson as the half-god beefcake of Greek myth, strips its hero and tale of most of its fantastical elements.

Arts

Scientists recreate world's smallest Monet copy

Scientists have reproduced a famous Impressionist painting using nano-printing, to create what has been described as the world's smallest work of art. Reworked at the…

Television

Jerry Seinfeld is ambidextrous, and other Reddit AMA…

See some of the weirder highlights of Jerry Seinfeld's recent Reddit AMA.

Going Out

Grab a pedestrian and start dancing at What…

As a New Yorker, I’ve mastered the art of focusing my gaze straight ahead. Though it occasionally piques my interest, the absurdities that play out…

U.S. Soccer

Orlando City takes shot at NYCFC over Frank…

Orlando City reminded the world how big a signing Brazilian star Kaka earlier this month with a photo of Kaka mobbed by fans juxtaposed against Lampard.

NBA

Jeremy Lin says 'Linsanity' is over as he…

Jeremy Lin lit up the NBA two years ago with his play for the Knicks but he has no desire to recreate "Linsanity" in his new career with the Lakers.

NFL

2014 NFL Fantasy Football Top 100 overall player…

2014 NFL Fantasy Football Top 100 overall player rankings

U.S. Soccer

NYCFC announce signing of Frank Lampard

The tease of a big signing Thursday by new MLS side NYCFC ended up being one rumored for weeks. England midfielder Frank Lampard agreed to…

Tech

Forget Wi-Fi: Li-Fi could be the future

Li-Fi technology – developed by Mexican company Sisoft – is wireless internet connectivity using specialized LED light.

Tech

Weather app Climendo might be the most accurate…

The wait for a truly accurate weather forecast could finally be over thanks to a nifty new app called Climendo.

Tech

Napkin Table puts focus off the phone and…

Michael Jan, a design student at Tunghai University in Taiwan, has invented a serviette-picnic blanket hybrid called the Napkin Table.

Style

Essie's new Color Boutique

Essie launches high-tech kiosks at major airports and malls across the country.