Jerod Mayo mayonnaise had to have been created by Chris Berman, right?
There is no possible way, given the closeness of Bristol, Conn. and Foxboro, Mass., that ESPN studio host Chris Berman did not come up with “Jerod Mayo Mayo,” right?
Berman, who hasn’t come up with a solid or culturally relevant nickname since the glory days of Vincent “Ultimate” Brisby and Chuck “New Kids on” Knoblauch, did not waste any time in the 2008 NFL Draft when Mayo was picked by the Patriots 10th overall.
“So look at this. The New England Patriots go with Tennessee linebacker Jerod ‘Hold the’ Mayo at No. 10,” Berman said at the time to a stunned audience.
At this point Berman is whatever the exact opposite of a New York Post headline writer is. His nicknames have become so obvious and so anti-clever that they’re almost coming right back around to being funny again.
Wednesday, MyFOXBoston.com reported that Mayo is, of course, getting his own line of “gourmet mayonnaise” (whatever the hell that means – can you eat it by itself?) and will be at the Shaw’s super market in Brockton, Mass. to introduce the mayo at 2 p.m. on Saturday. Ahhhh, the life of an injured NFL star.
It remains to be seen if the man who first realized that “Jerod Mayo” could be linked to the condiment “mayonnaise” will be present, but it’s only a two-and-a-half hour car ride. See ya there, Boom.
Follow Metro Boston sports editor Matt Burke on Twitter @BurkeMetroBOS