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We say goodbye to Hollywood

Oscar nominations were revealed and went as expected. But all this movie watching got us thinking. How about the Sports Oscars from 2010? The categories and options are laid before you. <br /><br />

Oscar nominations were revealed and went as expected.

Nobody asked me, but here’s how I ranked the 2010 movies: “The Fighter,” “The Town”(Ben Affleck got snubbed), “The Social Network,” “True Grit,” “Inception” and “Salt.”

If “Salt,” which is like the Bourne series, with Angelina Jolie instead of Matt Damon in the lead, had removed two to three silly moments, it would have garnered more acclaim.

But all this movie watching got us thinking. How about the Sports Oscars from 2010? The categories and options are laid before you.

Best performance, male
» Tom Brady, football
» LeBron James, basketball
» Landon Donovan, soccer
» Rafael Nadal, tennis

Best performance, female
» Connecticut Huskies, for NCAA world domination
*Nobody is close, and Geno Auriemna’s speech would be too classic to pass up.

Most impressive female athlete on red carpet
» Caroline Wozniacki, tennis
» Lindsey Vonn, skiing
» Serena Williams, tennis
» Natalie Gulbis, golf
» Ana Ivanovic, tennis

Worst performance in a big spot
» Anyone from Lakers-Celtics, Game 7
» Jay Cutler, Bears-Packers
» Tiger Woods’ golf season
» LeBron James, “The Decision”
» Sidney Crosby, Stanley Cup playoffs vs. Montreal

Best sports-related fight
» Cardinals-Reds in August (Johnny Cueto was kicking people like the “Karate Kid”)
» That clown in the stands at the U.S. Open
» Ohio Bobcats mascot’s sneak attack on the Ohio State mascot (Brutus)
» Nationals-Marlins in September (remember when Nyjer Morgan got clotheslined?)
» Shrimpy jockeys fighting at a warm-up race at the Breeders’ Cup

Highest ‘Above the Rim’ (girlfriend/wife)
» Marko Jaric, of NBA/international basketball fame (wife: Adriana Lima)
» Jeff Garcia, former NFL QB (wife: Carmella DeCesare)
» Andy Roddick, tennis (wife: Brooklyn Decker)
» Mike Comrie, hockey player (wife: Hilary Duff)
» Shelden Williams, NBA (wife: Candace Parker)

Biggest fraud
» Rafael Palmeiro, baseball
» Mark McGwire, baseball
» Lance Armstrong, cycling
» Danny Almonte, little league baseball
» Tony Parker, NBA

Most unfortunate naked athlete revelation
» Greg Oden, NBA
» Brett Favre, NFL
» George Hill, NBA
» Brandon Spikes, NFL

Note: You may notice the complete omission of any NASCAR. Well, we aren’t sure if driving a car in circles is a sport. Hobby? Activity?

Metro does not endorse the opinions of the author, or any opinions expressed on its pages. Opposing viewpoints are welcome. Send 400-word submissions to letters@metro.us.






 
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