Remember when your dad took you into the woods to teach you how to shoot and kill witches? No? Well, Hank, Delia’s weird husband, does and this episode of “American Horror Story: Coven” revisits his childhood. We see Hank’s dad teach him how to load a gun, and the two go into the forest where Hank sees a witch crying and begging for mercy. His dad tells him to “put her down,” but little Hank chokes on the trigger and the witch lights the brush on the ground on fire. Hank and his dad survive, but his father reminds him to “never forget who they are.”
Marie Laveau is taking care of her customer when Fiona walks in with Delphine’s head and tells Marie needs to talk to her. Delphine’s headless body is not in a topless bar, but it is still in Marie’s cage. Fiona wants to cut a deal with Marie and make an alliance: She informs Marie that witch hunters are coming after them. Marie is not interested and she asks Queenie to take away Delphine’s head and burn it.
Back at Miss Robichaux’s, Delia is feeling her way around the kitchen. Myrtle stops her and asks Delia if she knows that she never threw acid on her face. She tells Delia she loves her like a daughter, but Delia already knows that.
Meanwhile, somewhere in Atlanta, Hank is at a sort of witch hunting headquarters to meet with his father. Hank is in trouble for “getting his hands dirty” and cutting a deal with Marie Laveau. We learn that Hank is a sloppy witch hunter who has killed innocent bystanders in the past. Hanks’ dad reminds him to never “lose himself to the lie” that he is in love with Delia, because she will have to die one day, too.
The rest of the witch council are at Miss Robichaux’s and Myrtle is feeding them melon balls. Quentin compliments Myrtle on her skin, but she’s not so easily flattered. She tells them the story of Misty Day, who came back to life stronger than ever, and she says coyly it sounds rather like her own story. The two suddenly become paralyzed after Myrtle has fed them a special potion. Myrtle realizes out loud that she is so forgetful that she left the melon baller in the fruit bowl. She promptly uses it to scoop out Quentin and Cecily’s eyes. The sweet fairy godmother upcycles the eyes and gives them to Delia, who can now see again, albeit with two different colored eyes. Unfortunately, Delia’s clairvoyance is also gone. As for the rest of Quentin and Cecily’s bodies? Myrtle hacks them up viciously, limb by limb.
Fiona’s not exactly happy that Myrtle is back and threatens to banish her to the ultimate hellhole: Paramus, N.J., where this author’s mother is from. I mean really, is it that bad? It’s only 30 minutes from New York City and as Fiona points out herself, there are plenty of outlet malls there!
Zoey and Madison are looking for Nan and they find her in a hospital waiting for Luke, who is in a coma. Luke’s mother, the holy roller, is not happy the witches are there and she tries to kick them out of Luke’s room at the hospital. But then Luke speaks through Nan and Nan tells his mother that he wants to hear her sing “A Closer Walk” – the same song she sang when he was eight years old and broke his arm. Luke’s mom has a change of heart and starts singing to her son as she takes Nan’s hand.
Over in the Ninth Ward, we discover that Queenie did not burn Delphine’s head and is keeping her in a room, forcing her to watch Alex Haley’s
“Roots.” This might be worse than a fiery fate for Delphine, who squeezes her eyes shut and tries to sing loudly enough to cover the show’s audio.
Meanwhile, Hank is being cut up from the inside, bleeding from his wrists and his stomach. Marie is punishing him through her voodoo tricks. One of her henchmen appears to ask him where the heads of the white witches are. She reminds him his deadline is tonight.
Delia and Misty are hanging out in the greenhouse. Delia is teaching Misty how to revive dead plants. Hank shows up and gives Delia a big hug but she can tell he’s drunk. Hank meets Misty and remembers trying to kill her. Hank is begging Delia for her forgiveness but Delia tells him it’s too late – she has already filed for divorce. Fiona and her new dog bump into Hank on his way out, where Fiona informs him that she got a bitch because “females are more loyal and aggressive when it comes to protecting their families.”
Back in the hospital, Nan and Luke’s mother are becoming fast friends. Luke tells his mother through Nan that he knows what she did to his mother: She killed him and he tells her that God is judging her for it. We flash back to a scene of Luke’s father sitting in a car, trapped with a bee. Luke’s father was allergic and died of anaphylactic shock. Luke’s father was going to leave his wife for another woman, so Luke’s mom left a bee in the car and killed him. Luke’s mother decides she doesn’t like Nan so much after all.
The girls return to Miss Robichaux’s and find Kyle chatting and playing cards with Fiona. Fiona tells them she “spruced him up.”
Queenie returns to her room, where Delphine tells her very gleefully that she kept her eyes closed the entire time during “Roots.” Luckily, Queenie has a playlist set up, and next is Odetta’s performance at the March on Washington.
Suddenly, Hank storms into Marie’s home and shoots Queenie and the other voodoo witches. Hank has Marie cornered and is right about to shoot, but a wounded Queenie finds a gun on the floor and shoots herself in the head, taking Hank down with her human voodoo doll skills.
Over at the hospital, Luke awakes from his coma and tells his mother he knows she killed his father. She shushes him back to sleep and presses a pillow over his face.
And then something unprecedented happens: Marie Laveau marches up the steps of Miss Robichaux’s, and Fiona welcomes her inside.
Follow Andrea Park on Twitter: @andreapark