Running late to meet a date? A meeting with your boss? A doctor’s appointment?

Folks in the 20th century needed to use the oldnoggin’ to come up with a plausible excuse to avoid social censure in these situations, but late Bostonians in the 21st century can rest easy with the newly released MBTA Excuse Generator.

Alright, some of them are less than plausible. But some of the messages should have a familiar ring, mocking the familiar service alert tweets from the MBTA’s official accounts.

“#MBTA: #GreenLine: Minor delays due to a crushing sense of ennui at St. Paul Street. We are totally wearing our concerned faces right now.”


#MBTA: #BlueLine: Minor delays due to a runaway train at Wonderland. We are posting the next train will arrive in just 1 minute, but it's really way more like 10.

#MBTA: #OrangeLine: Major residual delays due to an earlier eldrich horror at Sullivan Square. We suggest continuing to stare blankly into the middle distance while you wait.

#MBTA: #OrangeLine: Moderate delays due to a busker with a permit to literally melt faces at Malden Center. We are totally wearing our concerned faces right now.

#MBTA: #BlueLine: Severe delays due to a Tom Brady suspension hearing at Wonderland. We encourage you to give up and just drive already.

Co-creator Todd Ching, 33, of Medford told Boston Magazine that he and his friend Andrew Logan came up with the idea during a particularly bad trip on the Red Line a few weeks ago.

Everyone who’s been on the MBTA in the past two years has horror commute stories,” Ching says. “You’ve been waiting for the T and it says it’s coming in one minute, and then 10 minutes later it finally shows up. So you see these reports that pop up on the marquee and you’re like, ‘What does that mean? That doesn’t mean anything.'”

“Not affiliated with the MBTA,” a disclaimer on the website notes. “Any resemblance to reality would be quite the coincidence.”

Oh, totally.

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