Get ready to take a shower to see if you’re crying or not!
The third season of “BoJack Horseman” has a trailer and a premiere date. Yes, July 22 brings back everyone’s favorite depressive, alcoholic horse who can never be sure if he can transcend his self-destructive nature or must live with his copious character flaws till his no doubt early death.
That’s right: While more successful people are Instagramming their summer vacays in some far-off paradise, where ice-cold margaritas flow like water, you’ll be cooped up in your darkened room with an empty bottle of Old Crow, tweeting out the Netflix show’s darkest lines from the fetal position you’ve assumed during a six-hour binge watch of a program that reminds us that happiness is a delusion and failure is a mainstay of the human condition.
Of course, the despair will be broken up by genuinely hilarious one-liners, horse puns and inspired non-sequiturs, plus lots of absurdist visual humor involving anthropomorphic animals doing nutty things. Then again, can this new batch of episodes even top the dizzyingly ludicrous bit from last season where J.D. Salinger (voice of Alan Arkin) returned from the dead to host an inane and insane game show? Perhaps it can’t. After all, even those who are on top — like the show’s own former cheesy ’80s sitcom anti-hero (Will Arnett) — can fall to the bottom, then struggle to regain former glory that will never return.
So get ready to feel even worse about yourself and a world in which your parents may proudly vote for a racist demagogue who will destroy all the good created by eight years of Obama. But who knows? Maybe the third season will even bring back Vincent Adultman, the character who’s literally three kids stacked on top of each other hiding under a trenchcoat. And if it doesn't then that’s what we deserve for being such pathetic screw-ups.
But hey, let's throw pessimism to the wind and assume Season 3 is another whinny-er!
Anyway, behold the trailer, which finds BoJack not even able to bask in the glory of his show's well-deserved rave reviews. That's so him. Hell, it's so us.
Follow Matt Prigge on Twitter@mattprigge