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Russell Brand has a brand new wife

In case you were wondering.

Russell Brand — former husband of the personification a stale rainbow swirl lollipop known professionally as Katy Perry — has a new wife that isn’t Katy Perry. Hooray, I guess?

Brand married fellow British person Laura Gallacher over the weekend in a ceremony so small and so intimate that various outlets reported on it on Monday morning. The reception was Indian-themed which um, OK! Attendees included family and friends and their 9-month old daughter Mabel, which all sounds very standard!

The not that funny dude confirmed the news on Sunday on his Radio X podcast, saying, “I’m living a married life now… I’m domestic.” Sure!

Brand and Gallacher, a lifestyle blogger, rekindled their romance in 2015. Before then, they’d been dating off and on since 2007.

If you’ll recall, Brand was married once before to Katy Perry for 14 months. He broke up with her via text message — but if you think it’s bad, it’s just because the fame was just like, too much for him, you know? “Obviously the marriage didn’t last for a very long time,” he said in a recent interview. “And I think that is to do with the undulated nature of fame and that living in those conditions and what was happening,” Brand said.

Still, in his 2015 documentary, “Brand: A Second Coming,” he said that Perry was the kind of person he hated, saying, “I’m associated with the very thing I detest: vapid, vacuous, plastic, constructed, mindless celebrity.” Kind of sounds like he’s talking about himself, but mmkay my dude.

Anyway congratulations I guess. I’m not fan of Katy Perry, but I’m sure she is counting her lucky stars right now.

 
 
 
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