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The Word: Lindsay Lohan at a loss for words in London stage debut

(Photo by David M. Benett/Getty Images) (Photo by David M. Benett/Getty Images)

Depending on who you ask, Lindsay Lohan either had a great first night or a terrible first night in her West End stage debut. Previews started this week of David Mamet's "Speed-the-Plow," and the first review, from the Daily Beast, is not terribly kind. "On the first night of previews, a work-in-progress feel is to be expected," Nico Hines writes. "But halfway through the second act of 'Speed-the-Plow,' the audience was openly laughing at Lohan's struggle to grasp Mamet's sharp, trademark dialogue."

Some audience members had fun with the gaffes...


But a tweet from one of her fans tells a different story. I just don't know who to believe anymore.

Maybe Lohan didn't have time to learn her lines because she's too busy pitching new projects. "I was with Tina Fey the other day and I said we should do another 'Mean Girls,' like an older version where they're all housewives and they're all cheating," she recently told Time Out London. "That would be really funny. I'll harass Tina to write it." Consider yourself warned, Ms. Fey. Also, doesn't Lohan know that there already is a "Mean Girls 2"? Oh wait, are we not supposed to talk about that one?


Make that the Sarokozy Twin?


Guys, we really dropped the ball on this one. Everyone's been so focused on George Clooney getting married that we may have missed Mary-Kate Olsen's wedding all together. The 28-year-old actress, designer and Wonder Twin was spotted this week in the Hamptons with her fiancé, 45-year-old French banker Olivier Sarkozy, both of them sporting what look like gold wedding bands — and the massive Cartier diamond ring Olsen used to wear was nowhere in sight. Which begs the question: Is there such a thing as a hobo chic wedding dress? And what self-respecting billionaire hangs out in the Hamptons after Labor Day?


Miles Teller takes himself to task for quote


Looks Miles Teller is engaging in a little bit of he said … he also said. The "Spectacular Now" star told W magazine that he felt "dead inside" while filming "Divergent," which didn't sit very well with fans of the franchise. "I didn't have an interesting part, and I'd taken the film for business reasons. It was the first movie I'd done that was going to have an international audience," he told the magazine. And you know who else wasn't very happy with the stuff Miles Teller said? Miles Teller. After his rep did some damage control, Teller took to Twitter himself. "I've never done a movie for 'business' reasons. I'm proud to be a part of 'Divergent' franchise," he tweeted. Basically, Miles Teller can't believe Miles Teller said that. I hope they never run into each other, or it could get ugly.


'I was a teenage Brad Pitt's girlfriend'


It seems like pretty odd timing, given that Brad Pitt has finally married Angelina Jolie, but his very first childhood girlfriend has decided to come forward and talk about their relationship — back in the '70s. Pitt and Kim Bell dated from the ages of 13 to 15 while at school together in Springfield, Mo., Bell tells the National Enquirer. "He's every woman's dream," she says. "Brad was a good first boyfriend. I think everybody knew he would be successful in whatever he would do. He had leadership skills. He was sweet and kind." That's nice and all, but seriously? She's just now thinking of this?


New book details Bowie's sex pit


Turns out the compulsion to make everything fur-lined in the 1970s was more about function than form — at least at David Bowie's place. According to a new biography by Wendy Leigh, Bowie and his then-wife, Angela, had a four-foot-deep, fur-lined play area in their London flat affectionately dubbed "the pit" that was used for the some spectacular feats of sexual strength. The Bowies "used to have the most amazing orgies at Oakley Street. Everybody f---ing everybody in the pit. Mick Jagger used to come there and be involved with sexual things," Leigh writes. To be fair, though, I feel like Jagger could get business cards printed up that list his profession as "involved with sexual things."


Snooki looking for a post-baby bust boost


While her pal the Situation is tangling with the IRS over tax fraud, former "Jersey Shore" star Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi has more important things on her mind — namely her bust. Polizzi tells Life & Style that once all her baby-birthing out of the way, Mama's getting a new set of ta-tas. "I would definitely get a boob job. I want to get that after I have all my kids," she says. But that doesn't mean she'd go in for liposuction. "I feel like you can just go to the gym and work that s--- off," she says.

Follow Ned Ehrbar on Twitter: @nedrick

 
 
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