Rick Grimes and his sweaty hair tendrils are back with a vengeance. With last night’s very explosive heavy premiere of the eighth season of “The Walking Dead,” we finally see the Alexandrians, Hilltop and The Kingdom come together against Negan and the Saviors. It’s, as the comic book version promises, All-Out-War.
Last night’s episode mostly served as a way to slowly reintroduce you to where the series left off and to remind you that these characters really love a monologue. All of them. And while this year’s premiere had a far less twists and turns than last year’s — rest in peace, Glenn and Abraham — there was still an itty bit of drama to spare.
Here are the most shocking moments from the first episode of the season.
Introducing, Old Rick
Old Rick makes an appearance in what could be a flash forward or some sort of fantasy sequence — so far, it’s hard to tell. But he’s got a full beard and a cane because, you know, how else would you know he was old? Especially since flash forward Judith has gotten older, but flash forward Michonne appears to be the exact same age as she is in the present.
The reveal of Old Rick's awful haircut
While we’re at it, we’d be remiss not to mention that Old Rick’s brittle haircut can’t hold a candle to the wet mess of curly sweat bangs Rick is presently rocking.
Yes, Maggie is still pregnant
Maggie is still reminding you, the audience, that despite having gestated through the last two seasons — despite not at all showing — she is definitely still pregnant. Because apparently in “The Walking Dead” time, it’s only been a number of weeks. Plus, showrunner Scott M. Gimple confirmed that we shouldn’t expect Maggie to give birth any time during the eighth season, so let’s continue to suspend our disbelief.
Gregory ditches Father Gabriel
Gregory is a self-serving coward. Everyone knows that! But Father Gabriel is gonna Father Gabriel. And of course, when he tries to save Gregory, the former Hilltop leader ditches him and steals his getaway car. It’s pretty rude, frankly.
Father Gabriel gets close to Negan
In an attempt to escape the walkers, Father Gabriel gets in the same trailer as Negan. What strange bedfellows these two will certainly make, huh? Their union also gives us a shocking, awful exchange. “I hope you’ve got your shittin’ pants on,” Negan says. Gabriel, as confused as the rest of us asks simply, “What?”
“Your shittin’ pants,” Negan answers. “I hope you’re wearing em right now. Because you are about to shit your pants.” Honestly, as a villain, how are people going to take you seriously when you talk literal nonsense? Consider it food for thought.