Men may not be able to control their Lulu score, but everyone can always control their behavior. / Flickr
Like it or not, the Lulu App is here. So instead of mentally masturbating over whether the app is good or bad, I think it’s more useful to discuss how to use it. If you’re a woman who’s going to consult it pre-dates, or a man who’s checking your ratings, keep these things in mind:
Ladies, the ratings aren’t objective. How many times has a woman offered to set you up with her amazing son, adorable cousin, or “single nephew you would just LOVE!” And if you’ve ever taken up one of those offers you know, generally the guy isn’t quite as great as was promised. This is all to say that ratings from family members and close friends are biased. And of course, ratings from any ex’s are just as biased in the opposite direction.
Guys, it takes two to tango. A bad sex score can mean as much about compatibility or her performance as it does about yours.
Ladies, before posting something nasty, just tell him off. If a guy treated you horribly you shouldn’t just take it. But posting a rant about him isn’t necessarily the best way to ensure he treats other girls better. Your best shot at affecting his future dating behavior is taking the high road and talking to him directly about why his actions were insensitive. Best to tell him to his face rather than try to get revenge behind his back.
Guys, a bad score on Lulu isn’t the end of the world. A girl reading something bad about you may slow her down. But if she really likes you, it’s unlikely to stop her.
Ladies, guys can act in a range of ways. As hundreds of guys told me when I was conducting research for my book Are All Guys Assholes?, guys are capable of acting immaturely and horrible to a girl they don’t care about and also being amazing boyfriends to a girl they do. One girl’s bad review doesn’t necessarily mean the guy is a bad seed. Though a trend may be a trend…
Men and women alike—we’re all out there looking for that special someone (or most of us anyway). But while we’re on that search for that someone, we owe it to each other to treat one another with respect—whether in person, online, or on Lulu.
