Holy cats, you guys. Brandi Glanville is insane! How do we know this (besides reading every tabloid story ever)? Let me present some excerpts from "The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills" star's new book, "Drinking & Tweeting and other Brandi Blunders," which were obtained by Life & Style:
Her reaction after finding out about Eddie Cibrian's affair with LeAnn Rimes:
"I'm not entirely sure how I ended up on the floor of my closet sobbing ... a teary-eyed Eddie found me lying there and without saying so much as a word, he started kissing me all over ... he pulled off my workout pants and we started having sex," she recalls. "He swore up and down ... that it was completely innocent. In that moment, it was easier to believe him, because I just couldn't stand the thought of being without him."
How she got her revenge:
There are some things you can't unread. This is one of them. Fair warning? Read on: "A brand-new vagina would be an Eddie-free vagina. ... I decided that since Eddie had ruined my vagina for me, he could pay for a new one. I gave [the doctor's office] Eddie's credit card number," she says about undergoing a vaginal rejuvenation for $12,000. Ack!
But, really, no hard feelings:
"I would like to thank my ex-husband, Edward Cibrian, for giving me all the material I could ever need to write this book and for helping me discover the strong independent woman inside of me," she writes.
What? No thanking the surgeon for discovering the new vagina outside of her?