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The Word: Mila Kunis, superhero extraordinaire – Metro US

The Word: Mila Kunis, superhero extraordinaire

Mila Kunis is having quite the scary week, but she’s been handling it like a pro.

On Friday, the actress called police after a man followed her to the gym for the third day in a row. Stuart Dunn, a 27-year-old homeless man, had previously been ordered to keep his distance from Kunis after allegedly breaking into her Los Angeles home in January.

Then yesterday, Kunis was dialing 911 again when a man who worked at her home suffered a violent seizure. After he collapsed, she turned his head to the side to prevent choking and offered to ride with him in the ambulance, reports TMZ.

It’s just as we suspected: Mila Kunis is an advanced superhuman with lifesaving powers, immune to even the perfect excuse to skip the gym. How else do you think she survived eight years in patterned bellbottoms opposite Ashton Kutcher?

Maybe she is crazy, too

Sheryl Crow had to ask her audience for help when she forgot the words to her hit “Soak Up The Sun” during her Saturday show in St. Petersburg, Fla. “I’m 50, what can I say! My brain has gone to s—!” she said after getting back on track.

Which begs the question: What wonderful, merciful rock has Sheryl been hiding under for the past 10 years? I still can’t get halfway through the grocery store without hearing about how carefree and tan this chick is.

Join the club, Humphries

Kris Humphries — better known as Kim Kardashian‘s ex-“husband” — is trying to win custody of that 20-karat rock.

“Kris wants the ring back because the marriage only lasted 72 days and he believes it was based on fraud and deceit,” a source tells PerezHilton.com. “Remember, Kim filed for divorce. Kris paid for that ring, and he just can’t fathom why Kim would want to keep it.”

Well Kris, we want the four hours we spent watching your wedding special back. Best to just move on.