There is a poopetrator on the loose in Brooklyn, responsible for smearing feces on a number of doors and keyholes in the Prospect Heights and Crown Heights areas.
According to a thread of posts on Brooklynian, residents in the area have been making the disturbing discoveries on their apartment buildings in the past month, though one commentator claims it happened to their building as far back as a year ago.
The poop smears seem to occur in a concentrated area around Vanderbilt Avenue near Park, Sterling, Underhill and Washington. The vandal has also struck on Prospect Place between Rogers and Nostrand Avenue.
"We initially thought it must be bored teens or a mentally ill adult," Lynn, a resident who did not want to give her last name, told Metro.
Some residents who are also dog-owners claim they are certain that the feces is from a human and not an animal. The distinction though, proves to be a point of contention as residents have debated on the thread how exactly to determine the origin of the excrement.
"Our dog could be used as a barometer on the human/dog issue. He only eats human poop. So, if needed we can bring him by a door and see if he will lick it," one resident, willing to help, said on the thread.
It's not clear whether the fecal-smeared facades are the work of one vandal or multiple perpetrators.
"No idea why it's happening," Lynn said. "Just wonder why anyone would want to handle the poop in the first place, no matter the reason."
While neighbors who weighed in on the stinky situation said they have yet to notify police, they are trying to work together to determine the best course of action for wiping the problem from their neighborhood.
"Sounds like someone needs to get a front door camera," suggested one resident. "They are getting cheaper and cheaper and could provide hours of entertaining footage for this website."
That's right, because poop news is not nearly entertaining enough!