Short column because 11 people were shot last night and, in case you haven't noticed, there was a freaking earthquake, people! The ground moved!

 

So we've got a guy who's pissed at a woman ... because he biked over her dog (seriously, is this bike people v. dog people feud a Philly thing, or do they innately hate one another?), a social group for apocalypticists who use aliases and a strip club car wash. Plus, smug hipsters. Never have two words in the English language gone so well together.

 

More like where desperation and deception meet for a quickie.

 

So, Costa Rica guy, are you trying to scam people through a hotel "partnership" or a pretzel-making business? Get your story straight, dude.

 

Nothing says “block party” like insurance agents, realtors, debt consolidators, and STD experts.

Oh, Northeast Philly. Sounds like its owner may be taking a trip, being that the police broke down their door and all …

In case you couldn’t tell, this ENTHUSIASTIC and TALENTED artist is NOT YOUR RUN-OF-THE MILL FACE PAINTER!!!

Dog people v. bike people, part MMMMMXXXXVIII. Can't we all just get along?

For regular people like you … who use aliases and want to join a secret club with a vague apocalyptic ideology.

Believe it or not, thieves in Philadelphia do not ironically steal shit. Buy a new bike tire. Yeah, really.

No job is too small ... emote.

Gunshot wound? Misunderstanding with police? Sounds kinda like my ex-boyfriend.

I like the direction this car wash is going.