It used to be, if you were a no-good hoarder, people would just tell you to pick up a copy of “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up.” In case you've been living under a rock, that's the Marie Kondo bestseller that deludes readers into believing they can fix their life if they throw out all their shit — “If it doesn’t spark joy, get rid of it,” or at least that's the line we keep hearing repeated everywhere (even Emily Gilmore knows the concept!).
But apparently, you no longer have to bother with reading the book. If you live in one of the Instrata Lifestyle Residencies’ five luxury rental buildings — located in Gramercy, Park Slope, Brooklyn Heights, Nomad and Hell’s Kitchen — you can book a KonMari consultant to do it for you.
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Instrata has partnered with the company to bring these consultants to NYC for the first time. We’re told they’ve undergone rigorous training in the Marie Kondo way, including 50 hours of practice sessions, and will help residents “identify what they value in life,” per the press release. While this offer only exists at Instrata residences, we can see it taking off as the latest luxury real estate amenity, a la in-house dog walking services and tricked out lounges.
The Kondo surrogates will come to your apartment and do said life-changing magic over several 5-hour personal organizing sessions, at $500 a pop. Sounds steep, but I guess not if you’re rich, dirty, lazy and don’t mind interacting with others. (What do you do if your KonMari consultant doesn’t spark joy?)
You too can become a KonMari consultant, if you complete these steps to getting certified (our favorite is number two, “verify that your home is tidy”). Apparently people think it’s a lucrative side gig, like driving Uber, except for folks who are into cleaning and speaking in mantras.