NYC & Company announced today that popstar Taylor Swift is their pick for New York City's "Global Welcome Ambassador."
The position's duties probably include welcoming developers into the city to build more condos, and hanging out in Tribeca.
We'd like to first off congratulate Miss Swift on her new position, and wish her the best of luck in her search for the perfect brunch spot or newest speakeasy in SoHo.
We'd also like to respectfully offerNYC & Company some alternatives they could have picked to beambassadorsfor our fair city.
These ambassadors might be a bit truer to the city's character and history.
Here are Metro's ten alternatives for NYC & Company's pick for the city's 'Golbal Welcome Ambassador':
The pet that all New Yorkers share.
Devoid of hipsters, full of attitude.
Gaining weight has never been easier or creamier.
They're like rats, but they fly and aren't as afraid of you!
These creepy copyright violations are all crowded in one inconvenient location.
We chose to not put a picture but rather link to it. Enter at your own risk.
We especially like the garbage that's been baking all day in the sun. Yum!
Indigestion for $5? Yes, please!
Winter is always coming.
They're on the trains these days too!