With the so-called cuffing season in full swing, booty calls may be few and far between. Even with the ease and convenience of dating apps, the sheer geographical size of the New York City area paired with the perpetually unreliable MTA can make for a difficult late-night hookup.
But with a little determination (read: desperation) anything is possible. And so in the spirit of love and lust, Metro spoke with a few New Yorkers who went the distance in the name of a one- (or two- or three-) night stand. Here’s what they had to say.
Lesson: Sometimes men won’t do anything for sex
Name: Maya*
Age: 30
She lives in: Brooklyn, NY
Her hookup lives in: Hoboken, NJ
Mode of transportation: telecommute
Estimated travel time: zero
How they met: Happn
This hot guy messaged me on Happn when I was visiting a girlfriend in Hoboken. Our messages started off sweet and respectful until he learned that I didn’t actually live in Hoboken — that I was a Brooklynite. He told me, “Sorry, Brooklyn’s too far for me to travel.” I was like, “Are you serious?” and he was. He unapologetically argued there were plenty of women in Broboken. So the sweet, get-to-know-you messages turned to sexting, and I was fine with it. Sexting turned to phone sex, and I was just as fine with that. Long story short, this dude was not willing to travel across Lower Manhattan for real sex. I respected his honesty.
Lesson: A good ‘Sunday kind of love’ requires a weeknight encore
Name: Sierra*
Age: 25
She lives in: Brooklyn, NY
Her hookup lives: Mount Vernon, NY
Mode of transportation: Driving
Estimated travel time: 30 to 50 minutes
How they met: At a party
“I personally have never dated anyone that didn’t live in my immediate 20- to 30-minute radius. And people in Mount Vernon, they’re not as ‘hood’ as I am, so that was really interesting. The first time we hooked up I didn’t care about the distance. I was like, ‘Oh my God, he looks so f—ng good.’ I wasn’t looking for anything permanent, and I was also dating people in my local area. So it wasn’t a big deal — he was just an extra guy. But then we kept on talking and it was more serious. I was like, ‘Oh s—t, I’m not comfortable with him just being my Sunday guy. The D is good, and he’s cute!’ So he became my Sunday and Wednesday — and sometimes Thursday, Friday guy.”
Lesson: Podcasts are a booty-caller’s best friend
Name: Alex*
Age: 25
He lives in: South Williamsburg/Bushwick
His hookup lives in: Upper West Side
Mode of transportation: Subway
Estimated travel time: 40 minutes to an hour
How they met: Coffee Meets Bagel
“She worked overnight shifts for a news organization in town, so her hours and my hours were already at odds before anything even started. More often than not, I’d try to have it my way by having her spend the night at my place during the week since she didn’t have to be at work until later in the day. But then there were the few times on the weekend where I’d feel guilty and make my way to her place then trudge my way back home at odd weekend hours where the subway just wouldn’t cooperate with me. It once took me about an hour and a half because the J/M wasn’t running between Brooklyn and Manhattan so I had to double back to a different line to get into Brooklyn and walk some more to get home. After a while, things just didn’t work out between us and that was that. We saw each other for a month or two about once or twice a week. That first time, I was a little bit worried [about the distance] but I also figured, ‘Why not?’ I listened to podcasts for the most part [during the commute].”
Lesson: Always check your dating app radius
Name: Phil*
Age: 26
He lives in: Hudson Yards
His hookup lives in: Westchester, NY
Mode of transportation: Uber
Estimated travel time: 45 minutes to an hour
How they met: On Tinder
“I didn’t really think anything of it — whether it was good or bad or funny, it was just whatever. I met him on Tinder, we had been on a couple of dates over the summer, but he lived in Westchester but worked in the city. The first time we hooked up I wasn’t concerned about the distance because I just saw it as a summer fling. One of the last times we hooked up was a night when I was out with my friends in the East Village or the Lower East Side, and I got a text from him and so I decided to take an Uber all the way up to Westchester. The commute wasn’t that big of a deal. I was pretty drunk and just texting friends. But yeah, I would not go that distance again and actually have reset the radius on my app to 10 to 15 miles now.”
Lesson: Work-adjacent hookups cut commute times
Name: Monica*
Age: 23
She lives in: Hoboken, NJ
Her hookup lives in: Bushwick
Mode of transportation: Uber/ train
Estimated travel time: 45 min
How they met: At a bar
“To be quite honest, this guy lives very close to my job which is the halfway point between where each of us lives, so it’s super convenient and I’ll usually go there after work. And then when I go home he’s very kind to order me a car home — which is usually a 45-minute drive — and I spend it on the phone, listening to music or half asleep if I’m hungover. Also, if I stay over on a ‘school night,’ it cuts my commute time to work by half so that’s always a plus. Also, he’s never been to my place — but I prefer it that way.”
*Names have been changed to protect the privacy of the individuals.
