kevin winter/getty images file photo
Flowers, perfume, a photo album — it doesn’t really matter what you give her, because all most mothers want is to spend time with their children on Mother’s Day.
Here’s where you whip out the Blackberry, personal diary, or little yellow sticky and make a note to self — this coming Sunday is Mother’s Day. A day specifically designed, and yes, commercialized to the extreme, to make sure that mothers across North America are recognized and celebrated.
(Stay alert for my You Know You Want it! column this Friday for gift ideas).
For some, those who have lost their mother or conversely, their children, it’s a day of memories and sadness. For the majority, however, it’s a day to get- together with family and enjoy each other’s company. Either way, it’s a time to reminisce.
My family tends to do the basic restaurant brunch, or backyard barbecue dinner. Anyone who’s in town, including all step-siblings and partners, are welcome — which means that every year, it’s a different gang. We get together, eat, laugh, and exchange small tokens of appreciation.
Two years ago was my first Mother’s Day as a mother, and it was definitely very special. Friends and relatives called to wish me well, which was completely unexpected. Last year, my step-sister joined the ranks, and this year, my sister-in-law has become part of the motherhood gang.
You realize immediately, when you first become a mother, that it’s not about the presents, or where you spend the day. Obviously babies don’t have a clue what makes the day special, but it’s the overall feeling — an overwhelming surge of love, for both your child and your partner; and a sense of respect, love and understanding for your own mother.
So, here’s my advice: If you’ve said to yourself in the past that it’s just another day in which greeting-card companies want your money, then think beyond yourself. Make this year different. Have you ever pondered whether you’ve ever taken the time to tell your mother, for no other reason than she is who she is, that you appreciate the role she’s played in your life? After all, even a sometimes flawed mother is still responsible for you being here at all.
And if you’re a mother yourself, allow yourself to bask in the appreciation and acknowledgement that comes your way — from your children or anyone else. Whether it’s a single flower or just a drop-in visit, simply managing to be together in these busy times is an important part of family life.
For those of you who are distant from your mothers, or who have lost mothers along the way, consider this: Might not there be a woman in your life who’s offered you the caring and concern that you’ve needed? Maybe it’s a neighbour, perhaps an older colleague, or maybe even an aunt — whoever it is, be sure to thank her for giving you that extra mothering we all could benefit from.