‘The Book of Eli’
Albert and Allen Hughes
Denzel Washington, Mila Kunis, Gary Oldman
Grade: ?????


Dusty, stale “Eli,” you are a pale imitation of “The Road” and a poor man’s “Waterworld.” You are the unseasoned tofu of post-apocalypse genre. As is coming to be the norm with these films, an intriguing premise is watered down with too many shoot ’em up scenes and too little character development and plot. People watch post-apocalyptic films partly because they want to know what, at least in some director’s imagination, the future would be like, and by the Hughes Brothers’ estimation, we’re all going to look like we just got out of the mosh pit at Woodstock ’94. While “Eli” does paint a bleak picture, it’s too light on the details to make for a compelling, complete universe that would be entertaining to watch. Instead, we get a run-of-the-mill cat-and-mouse chase, led by Denzel Washington in a role he’s becoming more and more accustomed to — the righteous martyr.