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Bring on the spam already: Some penile enlargement methods may actually work

*But they're the weird ones, and you have to do them for months, and it may only work if you were really small to start with.

The Daily Mail, your new second-most-popular web site in the world, not that we're jealous or insecure or anything, has got a scoop: Just as every web spammer in history has promised, it is possible to make your penis bigger.

However, there are some big "howevers" in there. For one, one sure way to get bigger is surgery, which, no surprises here, was found to be dangerous with an "unacceptably high rate of complications," according to a new study by Marco Ordera and Paolo Gontero at the University of Turin.

More effective, the study found, was the traction method of enlargement, which: we don't actually know what that is? (OK, now we do. Gross.)

One study of the traction method reported an average increase of 1.8cm while in a flaccid state.

Another reported that the penis measured an extra 2.3cm on average when flaccid and 1.7cm when erect.

However to achieve these results the men had to follow an arduous regime which involved six hours of traction a day for four months in the first example, and four hours for six months in the second.

The famous "penis pump" was also given a run-through and found to effective, if used for six months.

So there you have it: Penis enlargement schemes do work, but only the weird ones, and you have to keep attaching those strange devices to your Johnson for months at a time. Would it be worth it? (via The Daily Mail)

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