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Butting heads over effort

<em>It’s a constant battle in our home: My partner thinks she does more work in our house and relationship than I do.</em>

It’s a constant battle in our home: My partner thinks she does more work in our house and relationship than I do. Everything is a competition with her. What to do?

Angela says...
If you’re a two-income household, it’s not fair for one person to shoulder the majority of the household upkeep. Put yourself in her shoes for a minute to figure out where she’s coming from. Is she really burdened with an unfair share? Or is it that you find time to play hockey with your friends while she’s home alone? You may simply need to find ways to make her feel as though there’s more of a balance (even if you’re not really changing much). Encourage her to go out for a manicure or a movie night with girlfriends.

Derek says...
She might be taking jabs at your endless complaints about being tired. Secretly start a scorecard of relationship responsibilities and check off who does what in your home. If it looks like you’re slacking, pitch in. After all, you don’t want to enter a competition you can’t win. But if you’re coming out on top, it’s time to discuss rewards for the winner.

 
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