"I like my women with a little meat on her bones.” While men will say this about women, you rarely hear women say the same about men.

Maybe this is because men feel they have to say this because women with a little meat on their bones are made to feel like they will automatically be less desirable and therefore must be reassured they are still indeed dateable while meaty men don’t feel the same pressure?

After all, I don’t think I’ve ever hear a man say, “Do these jeans make my butt look big?” as a roundabout way of looking for reassurance from his partner that she is still physically attracted to him. And, on practically every married couple sitcom, the wife is a perfectly shaped babe while hubbie’s usually, well tubby, and none too bright.


I don’t think it’s so much that women as a rule simply prefer their men meatier and dumb (though I’m sure some do, the meatier part that is, just as some men genuinely do prefer a little meat on their women’s bones) but because socially, it is more acceptable for men to be heavier than it is for women.

Also, because women live with the pressure to be thin their whole lives, they are possibly more accepting of a less than perfect body on a man. But maybe I’m giving women way too much credit. Because when it comes to physical attraction, women and men can be equally shallow.

A man may say he likes a little meat on a woman’s bones, but I guarantee he wouldn’t feel the same if all that extra meat was concentrated entirely around her middle and her thighs. And, while women may be a little more forgiving, given the choice between her dream guy having six-pack abs or a gut from drinking too many six packs, she’d opt for door number one.

We are a fat-phobic society. Remember that short-lived reality show last year, More To Love, featuring heavier women vying for the love of one equally hefty bachelor? Most of these women had either never dated or spent their whole adult lives being passed over for thinner girls.

I remember one woman describing the show as her last resort in her attempts to meet someone. Though come to think of it, little fuss was made over the size of the bachelor these women were vying for.

He was in no way trim but none of the girls seemed to think this was an issue. So maybe women are more accepting of a guy with a little meat on his bones.

What do you think? Are women more accepting of heavier men than men are of heavier women?

Josey Vogels is a sex and relationship columnist and author of five books on the subjects. For more info, visit joseyvogels.com.

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