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It kind of goes without saying

Conversation is an art form. The simplest advice is to ask questions ... and actually listen to the answers.

Conversation is an art form. The simplest advice is to ask questions ... and actually listen to the answers. Nothing says “I’m a total jerk” quite like gazing absentmindedly at some hottie shooting pool in the back of the bar while your date tells you how she ate her lunch in the bathroom during high school.

But you can’t just ask any old question. For example, don’t ask a question just so you’ll get to give your own answer (“Oh, what did I get on my SATs? Well, funny you should ask, I scored a perfect 1600!”)

And there is such a thing as a stupid question on a first date. If you ask, “Where do you see yourself in five years?” or “If you could be any kind of tree/animal/Burger King entree, what kind would you be?” your date will assume you read a book about what to ask on a first date — or, worse, they’ll feel like they’re on a job interview.

We’d also advise avoiding religion on a first date, as in, “Tell me all your thoughts on God” or “You’re pro-life, right?”

Rule No. 1 for things you can say to your date? Compliment, compliment, compliment. But pay attention to those numbers! No more than three times in a night. If you are on the receiving end of a compliment, always take it gracefully. And finally, readers, do not make stuff up — except for your SAT score.

Feel free to lie about that. If he or she is able to find that info online, then this date is kinda psycho.

Em & Lo’s latest book is “SEX: How to Do Everything.”

Visit EMandLO.com for your daily dose of sex, love and everything in between.

 
 
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